7 Ways To Be Insufferable On Facebook

The memory is vivid.

New Year’s Day, 2013.  I’m going about my afternoon pleasantly, when I open my email and a friend has forwarded me what she calls a particularly heinous Facebook status from her newsfeed, written by someone we’ll call Daniel.  It read:

2012 was a biggg year for me. I left my amazing job at NBC to move back to Chicago. I started dating my angel, Jaime Holland. I started yoga (thanks Jake Fisher & Jonah Perlstein!). I wrote an album with Matthew Johannson. Wrote another album I’m proud of. I got to hang with Owen Wilson, and worked with Will Ferrell on an amazing project. Had a conversation about Barack Obama with David Gregory. Danced. Joined a kickball team. Won a couple awards. Helped my sister plan her summer trip. Swam a lot. Golfed a little. Cried more than you would think. Read The World According to Garp. Saw Apocolypse Now. Went to Miami for the NBA Finals. Drank the best orange juice I’ve ever had with Davey Welch. Tweeted. Went to amazing weddings in Upstate New York. Drank a ridiculous amount of milk. Learned how to make sand art. Saw a great light show. Saw the Angels and Lakers. Fell in love with Jawbone Up. Cooked with Jaime. Gardened with Jaime. Watched Homeland with Jaime. Wrestled with Jaime. Laughed for hours with Jaime. Fell in love with Jaime’s family. Worked on a play. Played World of Warcraft. Did some improv. Played a ton of the guitar. Really just had a wild, amazing year. What a world.

By the time I finished reading, I realized that my non-phone hand was clutching tightly to my forehead, forcefully scrunching my forehead skin together.  I had the same facial expression I’d have on if someone made me watch a live event where people had their skin slowly peeled off.

It was everything bad about everything, all at once.

But instead of distancing myself from the horror, I soaked in it.  I read it again and again, fascinated by how something could be so aggressively unappealing.

It made me think about what makes terrible Facebook behavior terrible, and why other Facebook behavior isn’t annoying at all.  It comes down to a pretty simple rule:

A Facebook status is annoying if it primarily serves the author and does nothing positive for anyone reading it.

To examine this a bit, let’s start by discussing the defining characteristics of statuses that are not annoying.

To be unannoying, a Facebook status typically has to be one of two things: 

1) Interesting/Informative 
2) Funny/Amusing/Entertaining 
You know why these are unannoying? Because things in those two categories do something for me, the reader. They make my day a little better.

Ideally, interesting statuses would be fascinating and original (or a link to something that is), and funny ones would be hilarious. But I’ll happily take mildly amusing—at least we’re still dealing with the good guys.

On the other hand, annoying statuses typically reek of one or more of these five motivations: 

1) Image Crafting. The author wants to affect the way people think of her.

2) Narcissism. The author’s thoughts, opinions, and life philosophies matter. The author and the author’s life are interesting in and of themselves.

3) Attention Craving. The author wants attention.

4) Jealousy Inducing. The author wants to make people jealous of him or his life.

5) Loneliness. The author is feeling lonely and wants Facebook to make it better. This is the least heinous of the five—but seeing a lonely person acting lonely on Facebook makes me and everyone else sad. So the person is essentially spreading their sadness, and that’s a shitty thing to do, so it’s on the list.

Facebook is infested with these five motivations—other than a few really saintly people, most people I know, myself certainly included, are guilty of at least some of this nonsense here and there.  It’s an epidemic.

To lay out the most common types of offenses—

7 Ways To Be Insufferable on Facebook

1) The Brag

Bragging is such a staple of unfortunate Facebook behavior, it needs to be broken into three subsections:

1a) The “I’m Living Quite the Life” Brag

Description: A post making your life sound great, either in a macro sense (got your dream job, got your degree, love your new apartment) or a micro sense (taking off on an amazing trip, huge weekend coming up, heading out on a fun night with friends, just had an amazing day)

Examples:

  • Guess who just got her TFA acceptance letter!!! 
  • Hawaii! 
  • Tailgating, Giants game, night out with Dave, Matt, Paul, and Andy. I love you, Saturday. 

Core reasons for posting: Image Crafting (I’m successful; I’m happy; I have a great social life), Jealousy Inducing

So at best, you’re just really excited about your life and you need to tell everyone, and at worst you’re specifically hoping to make people feel worse about their lives and jealous of yours. Somewhere in the middle would be you calculatingly crafting your words as part of an unendearing and transparent campaign to make people see you in a certain way.

Let’s give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you’re just excited and need to brag to someone. Even if that’s the case, the only people it’s okay to brag to in life are your close friends, significant other, and family members—and that’s what email, texting, phone calls, and live talking are for. Your moment of self-satisfaction is profoundly annoying to people you’re not that close with, and they make up the vast majority of people who will be subjected to the status.

1b) The Undercover Brag

Description: Like the blatant brags above except behind a frail disguise. This includes all humblebrags, indirect brags, brags disguised as a rant, etc.

Examples:

  • Apparently they now give PhDs to frauds and drunks. What a time to be alive! 
  • I’ll be traveling for the summer if anyone knows someone looking to sublease a Soho apartment in July and August. 
  • On my walk home from work, I was whistled at twice, honked at twice, and one car almost caused an accident slowing down to stare at me. Sometimes I really hate men. 

Core reasons for posting: Image Crafting, Jealousy Inducing

On one hand, these people are at least self-aware enough to cloak their brag in something. On the other hand, they have the same exact core motivations as the blatant braggers and looking at these examples actually makes the first group seem almost lovable in comparison.

1c) The “I’m In a Great Relationship” Brag

Description: A public expression of your extremely positive feelings for your significant other or an anecdote signifying the perfection of your relationship.

Examples:

  • A surprise trip to Vermont for two nights in a cabin. All I can say is Wow, what a boyfriend. 
  • Thanks, Rachel, for the best year of my life.
  • Excited for a rainy Sunday of pizza, games, and movies with the wife. 

Core reasons for posting: Image Crafting (FYI, I have a boyfriend; I’m in a wonderful relationship), Jealousy Inducing

The image crafting and jealousy inducing motives here are transparent. The only less-appalling possibility could be that it’s an attempt to strengthen the relationship itself by showing how you feel in a more substantial way than just saying it in private. But really? You’re gonna drag 800 of us into this shit because you couldn’t find a more creative way to go over the top in expressing yourself?

The one very funny possibility when it’s a guy posting is that either he’s in trouble for something or that his girlfriend’s friend’s boyfriend pulled some shit like this at some point and his girlfriend has now been 10% mad at him ever since it happened, so he finally has to just bite the bullet.

The fact is, there’s no excuse for it, because if you feel the need to plaster your relationship all over Facebook, there are plenty of socially acceptable ways to do so—go nuts with couple profile photos, and enjoy three separate moments of like button and comment applause when you change your status to “in a relationship,” “engaged,” and “married.”


2) The Cryptic Cliffhanger

Description: A post that makes it clear that something good or bad is happening in your life without disclosing any details.

Examples:

  • That’s IT. I am DONE dating. 
  • This could be a biggggg day… 
  • Moments like these make all of the struggle and all of the pain worth it.
  • Ughhhhhhhhh 

Core reasons for posting: Attention Craving

The fun part of these is watching the inevitable comments and then watching how the author responds to them, if at all. This process slots the author into one of four sub-categories:

  • The celebrity: The author stays silent, treating the commenters like gawking fans.
  • 800 people’s collective high-maintenance girlfriend: The author explains everything in the comments, which means he wanted to talk publicly about it, but he didn’t want to just tell the public, he wanted the public to ask him about it.
  • The tortured protagonist: It’s something bad. The author responds but maintains the mystery—she’s unhappy about it and she “doesn’t feel like getting into it.”
  • Everybody’s special princess: It’s something exciting. The author responds but maintains the mystery—it’s really good and he “can’t say yet but you’ll find out soon!” Now you’ll have an extra hop in your step as you wait for the big news with bated breath! This is a special one because it also brings Narcissism, Jealousy Inducing, and Image Crafting in. What a fun person to have in your life!


3) The Literal Status Update


Description: An actual status update on someone’s mundane day.

Examples:

  • Off to the gym, then class reading 
  • Dumplings! 
  • Finally finished my paper! 

Core reasons for posting: Loneliness; Narcissism; Thinking a status update is supposed to be an actual status update

Allow me to present a visual—

“Finally finished my paper!” Okay…and? What are you looking for here? A fake congratulation from a bunch of people who aren’t emotionally invested in your struggle? Finishing your paper is green territory on the above chart, or if you had been working on it for a couple months, it might scrape the outer edges of the orange. For 90+% of the people who will read the status, it doesn’t come near the red territory, which is all they care about.

Off to the gym, then class reading. Oh is that what’s on tap for tonight? Who exactly are you telling this to? I really want to get to the bottom of this. At some point between leaving work and arriving at the gym, you had an impulse to take out your phone and type this status. Then you put your phone away. Tell me what was accomplished.

We’re talking about serious blue territory here, which means that even your mom doesn’t give a shit. A lot of annoying statuses fall far from red territory, but they all serve the author in some way, which is why they’re posted.

But info about your schedule doesn’t do anything to craft your image or induce jealousy in anyone—so it just seems a lot like Attention Craving’s sad cousin, Loneliness. I suppose it’s nice that Facebook gives a lonely person someone to tell their day to, and if these statuses didn’t come with the byproduct of reminding everyone else that life is meaningless and they’re gonna die someday, they wouldn’t have to be on this list.

The other possible explanation is severe narcissism, as if somehow, because you’re you, even the smallest details of your life are interesting to others. A weird part of the life of a major celebrity is that people are obsessed with everything about them, even their blue territory. If you’re not a major celebrity, this is not a problem you have, I promise.


4) The Inexplicably-Public Private Message 


Description: A public posting from one person to another that has no good reason to be public.

Examples:

  • I miss you! When are we hanging out? 
  • What a weekend with Julie Epstein and Emily Rothchild.  I love my girls!
  • All private jokes.

Core reasons for posting: Image Crafting; Jealousy Inducing; Narcissism; You’re over 80 and don’t realize there’s a difference between a public post and a private message.

My grandmother aside, there is no good reason to ever do this. Good is the key word. There are lots of very annoying reasons to do this. Let’s list them:

  • To make yourself seem cool and social and make your social life seem vibrant and fun
  • To show everyone what good friends you and the recipient are
  • To make people jealous or feel worse about their own lives
  • Because you’re acting like you’re in high school and you’re one of the popular kids whose social situation is actually an important thing for people

The one possibility I enjoy is that the message is written to be jealousy-inducing specifically for one individual who will likely be seeing it, whether it be an ex or a friend they hate. That kind of malice is so extreme it crosses over the far line and becomes awesome.


5) The Out-Of-Nowhere Oscar Acceptance Speech


Description:
An outpouring of love for no clear reason and aimed at no one in particular

Example: I just want to say how thankful I am for all of you who have touched my life. Your support means everything and I couldn’t have gotten through a lot of things in the last year without you!

Core reasons for posting: Attention Craving

I refuse to believe you feel a genuine outpouring of love for your 800 Facebook friends. And if you felt suddenly emotional about your best friends and family, is a public status really the way you’d express it? Wouldn’t contacting a few people by email or text be a lot more personal and genuine? Not relevant, because that’s not what’s happening here.

What’s happening here can really be boiled down to, “Hey everyone! I’m here! Hug me!” You know the inevitable response to one of these statuses, no matter who you are, will be dozens of like button hugs and comment arm squeezes. And isn’t that a little needy of you? You’re not feeling loving when you write this post—you’re feeling the need to feel loved. 

The one time this is somewhat acceptable is when it’s part of a huge collective group hug, like on Thanksgiving or Christmas. If you open Facebook on Thanksgiving, you’ll be treated to hundreds of Out-Of-Nowhere Oscar Acceptance Speeches. (These I could also do without, if you’re wondering.)


6) The Incredibly Obvious Opinion


Description:
When a big event happens, a post chiming in with the opinion we’ve heard 1,000 times.

Examples:

  • I feel so deeply for the Egyptian people fighting for their right to freedom. Everyone has a right to freedom and I pray that they prevail. 
  • My thoughts and prayers are with the families in Newtown after this unspeakable tragedy. I have no words to express my sorrow for those who lost a child. 
  • I’m disappointed about some things about Obama’s first term, but I’m happy he was reelected and hopeful about what his second term can bring. 

Core reasons for posting: Narcissism; Image Crafting (I’m the kind of person that has this particular opinion or reaction; I’m smart and I can say adult things)

These are annoying because A) you’re not saying anything remotely original or interesting on an event the media is already flooding our airways about, covering every possible angle, and B) you’re now making a huge, and often tragic event, partially about you. The sadness you’re feeling about the massacre of children isn’t really a key piece of the puzzle here, and you need not describe to us what the event looks like through your personal lens, especially when the lens is just transparent glass—if I want a side dish of narcissism along with my tragedy, I’ll just read celebrity tweets about the event.

7) The Step Toward Enlightenment

Description: An unsolicited nugget of wisdom.

Examples:

  • “Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.” ~Buddha 
  • Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. ~Proverbs 3:5-6 
  • I don’t see what the big deal is about new years and people claiming how different they are going to be next year. If you want to better yourself it shouldn’t matter what day of the year it is…. Me? Im going to be the same person I am today tomorrow.

Core reasons for posting: Image Crafting; Narcissism

Oh, where to begin.

First of all, let’s be entirely clear that there is no humility involved in a Step Toward Enlightenment post simply because you might be quoting someone else—the clear patronizing message is, “Ahh hello Facebook Friends. I am one who knows the secrets of life—allow me to teach you so that you too can one day find enlightenment.”

Secondly—you know what inspires people? You achieving something incredible and letting it be an example and inspiration to others. For your words alone to be inspirational, you need to be a gifted speaker or writer who really has something original to say—and we both know that’s not you. So for you to consider yourself an inspirational character by simply posting trite quotes is, well, flagrantly narcissistic. You’re assuming that you, just by being you, are inspirational.

Thirdly, let’s get to your real motive with these statuses—Image Crafting. You want people to see how enlightened you are and admire the spiritual journey you’re on.

* * *

Our friend Daniel’s post was quite a feat—in one simple paragraph, he sliced through my soul, accomplishing nearly every terrible status type and motivation discussed above.  The thing is, though, that if you looked right below his post, all you saw were likes and a couple friendly comments.

And that’s why insufferable Facebook behavior will never go away—there’s no dislike button or eye-roll button or middle finger button on Facebook, and it’s bad form to be too much of a dick in the comments below a status. So annoying statuses are just positively reinforced, and people remain un-self-aware that they regularly bring down the quality of everyone else’s life.

The bigger point here is that the qualities of annoying statuses are normal human qualities—everyone needs to brag to someone here and there, everyone has moments of weakness when they need attention or feel lonely, and everyone has some downright ugly qualities that are gonna come out at one time or another.

And that’s why you have people who love you. 

The thing that Daniel and most others haven’t internalized is the fact that if they have 800 Facebook friends, only about 10 or 15 love them. For an especially lovable person, maybe it’s as high as 30. Between 1 and 4%. That means that between 96 and 99% of your Facebook friends DO NOT LOVE YOU.

People who don’t love you don’t care about you or your day or your life that much, they’re probably not especially rooting for you, and they certainly want nothing to do with your worst qualities. And you doing something purely to serve your emotional or egotistical needs really should not show up on their computer screen—it just shouldn’t.

Okay, gotta go.  Off to the gym, then dinner, then home, then bed.

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405 comments - jump to comment field »

    • Anonymous

      Why would there be a thank you???

      Instead of writing stupid, and “uninteresting” articles (the title alone said enough for me so I didn’t bother reading the entire thing), this person needs to learn how to filter and be happy for his fellow human beings.

      If you’re not happy with what someone posts on THEIR OWN page, filter it or better yet, do them a favor of not dealing with you and unfriend them. If you want to wallow in your own annoying, uninteresting world that revolves only around you… create a facebook page and don’t add anyone to it and start posting things that only interest you!
      I didn’t bother seeing who the author was either but In general, the reason for picking on other people’s status updates is probably because they’re miserable with their own life.

      • Anonymous

        Sounds like the author just needs to get over himself. Is it really that annoying when people post about awesome things in their lives on facebook? Maybe the article should have included 8) Being “friends” with people you don’t have any emotional connection to. I’d be happy to see a post like “Daniel’s” from any of my friends. Good for them! No need to be so self centered.

    • Anonymous

      Why would there be a Thank you?

      Instead of writing stupid, and “uninteresting” articles (the title alone said enough for me so I didn’t bother reading the entire thing), this person needs to learn how to filter and be happy for his fellow human beings.

      If you’re not happy with what someone posts on THEIR OWN page, filter it or better yet, do them a favor of not dealing with you and unfriend them. If you want to wallow in your own annoying, uninteresting world that revolves only around you… create a facebook page and don’t add anyone to it and start posting things that only interest you!
      I didn’t bother seeing who the author was either but In general, the reason for picking on other people’s status updates is probably because they’re miserable with their own life.

      • Anonymous

        I understand the humor in this post… sometimes people’s facebook statuses can be irritating. But saying that a status extending condolences to victims of the Newtown shooting is annoying?! What the hell.

        • B McF

          I actually see where he’s coming from with the Newton thing. I also don’t think this should apply to every single post after the shooting. But a lot of my Facebook friends seemed to take Newton as an opportunity to have their strongly stated sympathy affirmed instead of taking the time to reflect upon what happened – which is almost too fucked up to think about… at least for me.

    • Anonymous

      Dear Author, as a full-time Facebook Stalker, how am I supposed to keep up with my victims if they don’t post trivial shit on FB all throughout the day?

    • Anonymous

      my thought: whoever wrote this, get it over with yourself. there are 2 options fb book offers to fix this problem: uncheck “get notifications,” and “show in news feed” for whichever friend who you couldn’t care less. or just simply defriend.

    • Anonymous

      It’s not about what people choose to post (or brag) about themselves or their lives–that’s who they are and they are free to seek their validations from their FB friends in whichever way they want to–it’s more about how we the FB friends react to it. If we are happy and secure about ourselves, jealousy/envy should be minimized and not come into play. The only thing you need to decide is whether you derive more positive or negative energy from that person. If it’s mostly negative, you know where the UNFRIEND button is!
      I am sorry but the person who wrote this article comes across as misogynistic and really not a happy person. The language and tone used is almost spiteful.

    • Anonymous

      This article hits all the criteria of an “annoying” Facebook status, and nothing on the amusing list. Too bad for your bullshit life.

    • Whatever

      I totally agree. We all get irritated with silly/unnecessary facebook posts but I really think you take this way too far & seriously just need a chill pill. When my boyfriend posted on facebook that he finished his PhD it was not to BRAG, but because it was the biggest thing in his life, he was happy, excited, relieved & wanted to share it with HIS FRIENDS (because generally it is your fiends who you are fiends with on facebook, not the general public). According to you thats bragging & attention seeking & reading something like that is infuriating. He apparently must just keep it to himself, basically because posts like that make you feel lesser (ie. jealous). I mean really.
      I opened this page because I thought it would be amusing & because, yes, the mundane “Im off to gym now” and cryptic attention seeking posts ARE annoying, but after your list what should anyone ever post on facebook??! What is left? Apparently all we should do is share interesting information, but we better not give our take on it! Since giving an opinion on something is apparently narcissistic (what the hell else is facebook for?), sharing a quote or something that may have touched you is apparently ‘image crafting ‘ or narcissism (umm maybe I just wanted to share something that touched me, maybe I dont obsess over my image- which you clearly do from what you have written- and I just thought hey, maybe ONE OF MY FRIENDS would also enjoy this) and sharing whats going on in your life is attention seeking or bragging. In my example above about my boyfriend’s PhD, his post also served another purpose- to let everyone know he was no longer chained to a desk & available to socialise again. But app someone like you would just get jealous and annoyed?
      There is allot of crap on facebook, but how about you remove the people you don’t want to hear from or MAYBE just judge less?! Why on earth would you let it annoy you so much?!
      I recon if you feel so strongly about what I see as 90% of facebook, just dont go online dude!

    • Anonymous

      I agree, all of the things happens in facebook are human being behaviour, and it’s okay I guess. People need attention, love etc. That’s why you’re pursuing your career, get a good job, salary, title, bcs one of the human being needs is recognition from another people. So I guess maybe you are lonely and up till now, there’s no one recognize you, hehe. chill bro, I know maybe this article is funny, but it’s not needed, everyone know and understand it clearly.

    • Anonymous

      This article is hilarious! It seems like the people that are the most offended, are probably the worst offenders. Most of the time when people update their statuses these days (about 90% of the time), it’s something stupid and ridiculous and I curse myself for even logging on Facebook and wasting my time. These words come out of my mouth for everything, “Shut up (insert name here)!” Because it is the same boring status….every….day…. I agree with this person, I am an offender for somethings, but I think this was hilarious and I reposted it because I think everyone on Facebook should read the article. :)

    • Anonymous

      all these angry people calling the author bitter are thinking about how many of their own posts people are thinking of when they read this.

    • Anonymous

      AnonymousSeptember 14, 2013 at 1:12 PM

      If people stopped posting annoying stuff on facebook, it would crash. It would be the end of days. Everybody does it.

      It doesn’t make it less annoying mate!

  1. I don’t know what Katie and Homer are getting so butthurt about. This author is eloquently stating what everyone else is thinking. Stop looking for attention. Enough with the holiday posts, vacation posts, “got a new job” posts, and anything else that is purely meant to get people to like your status. If we’re interested, we’ll ask you personally. Be a little more original in your statuses. Post something that people can relate to without making it all about yourself. Make people laugh. A large portion of my statuses are jokes. Maybe you should try it.

    • This is social media. It is for your friends to keep up with your personal life. It is sharing what you find to be interesting or funny. I think the heart of the problem here is that people ‘friend’ virtually anyone who asks. If you don’t want someone’s updates, don’t friend them, or else hide their posts. Problem solved.

    • The entire reason I’m on Facebook is to keep up with the lives of my friends and family and to help them keep up with me. If all of them stopped posting about themselves and the big and little and absolutely minute events of their lives and instead started posting links to HuffPost articles or endless jokes, I would no longer have any interest in being on Facebook. If my friends want to brag about some accomplishment or just take a second to express their satisfacation (or dissatisfaction) with some aspect of their lives, then I want to share that with them. Not wanting others to “bore” you with their thoughts and feelings and everyday accomplishments but instead “entertain” or “educate” or “uplift” YOU in some fashion is pretty much the height of selfishness.

    • Anonymous

      Funny, I thought it was for keeping up with people. I have collegaues on FB. I need to know when they’ve changed jobs. I have family on FB, and I like knowing how my neices’ gymnastics competitions went. I have friends on FB, who have genuiniely tough stuff going on, but schedules make it tough to connect — and I don’t know about YOU, but messages only work about a third of the time for me.

      So for the rest of us, who are humans, it’s a valuable tool for communicating a consistent amount of information to those who have expressed interest in that information.

    • Anonymous

      Easy fix and I agree with CaraMia creates………..I don’t need 800 FB friends. You can customize your FB page the way you want. I select and choose the people that I want to see, hear, and communicate with. They happen to be family and close friends. People I care to see, hear and communicate with and one’s that want to hear from me. Thanks for the article and all the responses, it was for good reading tonight. BTW, I jumped to this Blog because a good friend posted it on her FB page……………..

    • Anonymous

      Anonymous, these people don’t have to post status updates for the entire world to know about their private lives, why not send an inbox via facebook??

  2. Can the author please give some examples of posts that do NOT fall unto any of these categories? Isn’t the point of a social network to be, you know, social? I agree that many of these things can be annoying, and I have found myself un-friending or hiding certain people because of their posts. By the way, you left out people only ever whine/complain about things, and people who only ever post political rants. But “basically all photos”? Really? If I post “basically” any photo, I’m on my way to being insufferable? The fact is that while there are a lot of annoying things that people do on Facebook, people like FB because they can keep up with what’s going on in their friends’ lives that they may not be able to do otherwise because of physical distance (example: I have friends who live 10 time zones away from me, so I can’t just pick up the phone and call them any time of day like I can my other friends). I’d really like to know what are some ways I can post that do not break any of the above rules, because, while entertaining, I feel like the list in the article pretty much rules out any sort of communication at all, and renders Facebook – a product that boasts 700+ million users – to be completely pointless and illegitimate.

    • Infrequent infractions of these rules and ambiguous motives/intentions are more easily forgiven if such Facebook users spend more than 50% of their time of Facebook giving likes and comments to the best posts.

    • Anonymous

      @unknown July 11, 2013 at 5:15pm.
      “I found myself un-friending or hiding certain people because of their post. By the way you left out people who only ever whine/complain about thing”.

      Answer: yes the category relates to the whining as well. Saddness and negativity been applied.

      Author sounds like she just implying privacy. Privacy gone out the window where pple want to know everyone business in their life. Sad thing about the stories of some people who advertise their life are more prone to get lots of like and people who love their lifestyle will like their status in that moment.

      I find this private and overbearing. Im not friends with half people on my fb. None of them like my status if I was at a dance comp competing. Whole heartedly are they friends? My answer No. So fake that I knew I was judged and nkt like by all of them. Most I know just want numbers to look good.

  3. Fair points all around. To answer Unknown’s question—it’s all about that graph at the top, with the A, B, and C regions. Any status whose goal is to amuse or entertain or inform people—whether or not the goal succeeds—is not annoying. Because the intent was to provide something positive to others. “To amuse or entertain or inform” is a BROAD category. Lots and lots of types of statuses fit the definition.

    The reason people end up being annoying is that they mistake Facebook for being a good place to communicate with your close friends and family. They post for those people with no consideration that 95% of the people that will spend a few seconds of their day reading the post are nothing more than acquaintances.

    And a post that is meant for 50 close friends and is irrelevant or annoying for the 500+ acquaintances who will also see it isn’t a great thing to post on Facebook. The rule of thumb I’d use for posting statuses is to think about what you’d like to share with your acquaintances. If at least 80% of posts are specifically targeted toward your large mass of acquaintances and no more than 20% are targeted toward your close people, you’re one of the good guys.

    If you don’t have interest in creating most of your posts for your large group of acquaintances, Facebook isn’t the right place for your posts—try Google+ or a private Facebook group or an email chain.

    • What are you, the social media police now? YOU get to decide what is the right place or forum for someone’s posts, because YOU decide that? Man, some people really ARE insanely narcissistic…

    • No, he doesn’t get to “decide.” He gets to INFORM us that what we’re doing is annoying. And he’s right. Most status updates on Facebook are annoying to most people. If you’re someone who doesn’t mind your friends (as well as plenty of people you barely know) bragging, cryptically fishing for attention, outlining the quotidian details of their daily routine, stating the obvious, and conducting private conversations in a public space, then you’re in the minority.

    • Then you should delete everyone that you find annoying. If everyone else follows suit then the offenders will have no more facebook friends and the problem will solve itself.

    • Or you could just trim down your Facebook friends list to a manageable number of people whose lives you actually give a shit about (and who would care about yours in return).

      The entire purpose of Facebook is to connect with people. I LIKE hearing about other people’s days. And if I don’t, well, I skim, and no harm done. If I just wanted the whole community to be nothing but witty remarks and news updates, I’d join Reddit or something.

    • It depends why you use Facebook. I think most people use it to update their friends on their lives, not to pander to their attention span. When I go on facebook, I want to share things about my life. If you’re afraid that you aren’t “interesting” or “entertaining”, you’re pretty insecure. Seriously, dude, lighten up.

    • I get annoyed with some people’s posts. I delete the person from my friends list or hide their posts. Or, maybe people should not friend every person they’ve known since grade school. Maybe a person should friend their “friends” and close family rather than every person they meet.

    • Anonymous

      I think Unknown has a point here. It sounds like you’re cribbing because you have too many people on your Facebook who you don’t really give a damn about. When I see posts like “got a great job/boyfriend” or anything, it makes me happy, because I live 6000 miles away from a lot of people I care about. I’m not saying I have 300 soulmates, but I shared something with these people and it’s wonderful to see that good things are happening in their lives. And if bad things happen, I’d like to know too, if only to empathize and wish them well. And yes, I know I can post things that possibly only a portion of people will get, but the others don’t need to respond or care if it has nothing to do with them.
      Perhaps you should consider that a lot of people on your friends list may just be using Facebook differently that you are? Being a little discerning about who you add to your list might make all of these annoyances go away. :)

    • Anonymous

      I guess that is the point, do you think those people who live 6000 miles away care that you are going to the gym?
      This article was spot on, thank you so much, I have many close friends who do exactly the holiday photo thing, tagging people who aren’t even there in their images writing “wish you were here” and #yolo all over the place.
      “Loving life”, “life is great”, “amazing to be travelling again”.
      You know what the general trend is, those posts get snarky replies like “wow you do travel a lot” or one or two likes from the people they are travelling with.
      When I read those posts you know what I feel? Annoyance because I immediately feel that these people are rubbing their amazing lives into the noses of their friends who aren’t currently travelling or maybe cannot afford to travel.

      I’m going to share the hell out of this article on facebook and use another famous and infuriating Facebook technique to get people to read it:

      “If you don’t read and like this article you hate kittens and Jesus”

    • Anonymous

      Ok, I know this is probably naive and is certainly self-serving or I wouldn’t bother… But you can set the audience on each Facebook post to ‘close friends’, ‘public’, or some custom group. Why wouldn’t you just use that feature to post as appropriate to the selected audience? My observation is that the issues people have with Facebook are often that they don’t understand how they can apply controls to manage what they see and what others see. Granted, it is overly complex and changes to Facebook’s “privacy” features impact our faith that we really do have any control. Nobody’s perfect and all software has bugs, but we shouldn’t let any of that stop us from having a go. Feel free to tell me where I’m wrong, if you disagree.

    • a88

      Regardless of what your intentions were for the post, I completely agree with you on how you categorized these people. On point. On the other hand, what can a person post without falling into any of the categories? The only thing i can think of is “I just partied with Jesus” or such. That would definetely get attention from 98 percent of your audience aka “friends.”

      Over all, this article was extremely amusing because it is true.
      Most people post on facebook to get “likes” or comments. So it’s natural to fall into the categories he created.

      This post is just simply a fact and it is brilliant. Thank you.

  4. I think the only thing this article proves is that the person who wrote it is apparently an expert on being a douche on Facebook. You know what they say…takes one to know one. That, or they’ve missed the whole point of the internet and social networking entirely. Unknown already made the point that if you eliminated all content from Facebook that violated these seven “rules”, Facebook would become irrelevant. People don’t join Facebook so they can send each other private messages (perhaps grandparents excluded), they join so they can engage in the types of behaviors condemned by this article.

    The author seems to do a good job of playing at psychology, but it’s just that-playing. If the person who wrote this article actually understood humans or how they function, they’d understand that Facebook is just the newest version of something people have always done, which is to preen in public. What other reason were/are birth, death, wedding and engagement announcements posted in newspapers, where the vast majority of people reading them aren’t going to know or care about the people in the announcement? This shit isn’t new, it has just evolved with the flow of technology. Before, we had to wait to read the newspaper to find all this stuff out, but we people are all about instant gratification and Facebook provides that. We’re all just rats in Skinner’s box, and comments on a status update are the little sugar pellets.

    The other thing the author fails to mention is that many people are all about keeping up with the Jones’. So when they read that Susie Blahblah is off to Hawaii, they just smirk to themselves while they read the update on the veranda of their McMansion. On their iPhone, of course. I’d recommend the author look up the term schadenfruede, and then maybe they might understand Facebook just that much better. But if they don’t like humans behaving like humans ALWAYS HAVE on the internet, they should probably go read a book or something.

    • Completely and utterly agree.

      I’ve never really had a F2F conversation with someone that wouldn’t also involve- from both parties- all of these types of conversation threads. Interstingly the key difference about the F2F is that the mention of brag/comment/photo/anecdote one is actually just a conversation opener/continuation- waiting for an exchange and acknowledgement.

      My partner is of the same opinion as this author about Facebook while I’m completely in line with TheDoctorDonna. I think we will never agree. :) But- and I do think this is relevant – I have an extrovert personality type (and am a people pleaser – both positive and negative aspects of that) while is is a self assured, introverted personality type.

      So yeah, my big reveal? Um. It’s not like that for everyone….mate…. hmmm.

      I’ve always struggles with being profound on Tuesdays.

    • Jayden

      Totally disagree. This article is spot on, I’m just thankful facebook has an “unsubscribe” option these days so you can mute those that are so accurately described in this article.

    • Anonymous

      I also completely disagree. This article is spot on. Being on the internet doesn’t give you some special license to be a sociopath braggart with no sense of empathy. Sure, nobody is stopping you, but it might make your wiser connections question your behavior. For example; you don’t walk into a room with fat friends and complain about how you gained 2 pounds over the holidays. You wouldn’t congratulate yourself for losing 2 pounds either. Why would you do it online, Do you think they’ll resent you less for it?

    • Anonymous

      I like to see what everyone has to say on facebook. If it’s boring, I gloss over it, but generally I don’t over-focus and am not judgemental about any comments. And by the way, if you don’t like repetition when sending condolences regarding someone who died, what are your many ingenious ways of expressing your thoughts regarding this matter?

    • Anonymous

      “no consideration that 95% of the people that will spend a few seconds of their day reading the post are nothing more than acquaintances.” Then why are they your facebook friends? Why have 500+ acquaintances that will have no more influence on your life other than a funny cat picture? I think maybe, as a blogger, you have a biased view because you like having a large influence to get your ideas out to a ton of people. For us normal people however, we like to connect with people that, you know, we care about. So yeah this article was mostly just incorrect.

  5. Then again, if you observe human conversations and interactions it won’t take a genius to pick out the brag, the undercover brag, the “I’m In a Great Relationship” brag, those often random cryptic cliffhangers, the literal dimwits, the inexplicably-public private conversationalists, the out-of-nowhere Oscar acceptance speechmakers, those with incredibly obvious opinions and the ones sharing their insights toward enlightenment.

    I’m dying to know what the author’s status updates look like… Probably falls in the category ‘The UP Your Own Arse Goodie Two Shoes’… Yep, they walk among us… beware.

  6. All very valid observations but then again what is it about these status updates that annoy you so much? Maybe a bit of perfectionism? Your way is the right way and if something doesn’t fall into this category it’s worth being put down and ridiculed? I wonder what your motivations for posting this are.. image crafting… wanting to sound clever and witty… those motivations are basic human motivations which in itself is very interesting. Live and let live though I say, we all share some of the same hidden motivations and needs that sometimes have made us all write stuff that is a bit self seeking or un-interesting in an update, which in my book just tells me we are all humans. Have a good day :)

  7. Also you seem to be angry and a tad jealous about people going on holiday, having great relationships, achieving stuff and having fulfilling social lives. Maybe rather than trying to have people conform to what you think they should do you could spend less time on Facebook and blogging and spend more time to do stuff that you like to do with the people you love so when you read one of the “annoying” bragging facebook updates you can just smile and think of all the interesting stuff you’ve done and achieved in your real life and be happy that other people are happy about their lives also, maybe that they are a bit needy or looking for validation, but then again we all are.

  8. The point made in the article is not that people shouldn’t be themselves and shouldn’t enjoy Facebook, it’s that people shouldn’t be PROFOUNDLY annoying on Facebook. The areas of “insufferability” pointed out above aren’t broad, but rather specific kinds of statuses that tend to be specific to Facebook culture.

    Traditional human “preening” and self-validation is not the topic at hand here…Facebook is normal human petty interactions on steroids. There’s a basic courtesy expected in living human interactions, but from behind a computer screen, any semblance of reasonable social behavior can go out the window.

    You seem to be mostly protesting the article’s inclusion of item 1A above (“The Brag”), and on that point I don’t really disagree. Bragging at least goes back for centuries and while petty is at least honest. But things like the Cryptic Cliffhanger, the Literal Status Update, the Oscar Acceptance Speech, the Public-Private Message, and the Step Toward Enlightenment don’t really exist in the real world. They’re very specific strange ways people act when they’re behind a computer screen, and at least on my Newsfeed, 10% of people commit 90% of the offenses. Those are the people who need to read this article :)

    • ok, but if I decide to inform my friends things like “I’m going to the bathroom” or “I’m buying briefs”, isn’t that a little too much? doesn’t it clog they system?

      You seem to be taking this awfully personally. Are you just being defensive because you don’t like exposure of personal inadequacies?

  9. There’s a really simple solution, if human beings annoy you so much, get off the social media. I’m actually happy to hear about the personal triumphs of my friends. If you are not maybe the problem lies with you, not them. I *want* to hear about their achievements and see pictures of them on holiday. Sometimes people get a bit carried away but so what? They are your friends so learn to deal with it. If the problem is the number of “acquaintances” then don’t add them in the first place.

  10. Ahh! The always hilarious Person-Using-Social-Media-To-Complain-About-How-Others-Use-Social-Media. Too bad Facebook doesn’t have this thing where you could just not look at people’s stuff…oh wait, it does!

    • Sure I can block each friend individually, but don’t people have an obligation to practice self control? Would you really tell these things to people in real life? BTW, I will masturbate at least twice before any response on your part.

    • Jonk

      Amazing rollergirl how you only got half the joke. You identify exactly what the joke is, then skipped over the ironic punchline. oh well.

    • Ha ha ha! This is almost worth coming out of facebook retirement for.
      ‘Daniel’ is clearly a grade A c*%+ and the defensive replies speak volumes. Oh the lost art of self esteem…

  11. For better or worse, when friends and I get together in person, we can ALL agree on certain people who have become just impossible to take. And we can all agree on people who make us bust a gut or think deeper thoughts. For instance, we can all agree that George Takei wins at Facebook!

    But please, do instagram next?

  12. SPOT on. Just great.

    It’s not like it’s THAT bad to do these things on Facebook, but it’s also not THAT bad to talk about yourself constantly at a party or THAT bad to tell stories about your Valentine’s Day to that coworker you know is single because some sick part of you likes making them envy you. But let’s not pretend that acting this way is GOOD either.

    Anyone who is angry after reading this article needs to take a long look in the mirror and ask themselves why.

    • Anne Rainbow

      I totally agree with the author and yourself, but in saying that, I also read the NY resolution post and decided to not read all the comments on articles. Sadly, here I am, commenting again and it’s only the 5th of Jan…

  13. Jym

    ≈ You like me! You really like me!

    I’m always interested in good orange juice, though, and I did want to know more about that banana.

  14. I think this boils down to what we think the purpose of Facebook is. The author seems to think of it as a sterile, emotionless online environment full of people whose only wish is to serve his or her royal majesty. Talk about narcissism! We are human, and we live our lives primarily for ourselves (it’s a survival thing). So it is only natural that our Facebook activities reflect at least some of that perceived selfishness. I agree that when taken to the extreme, the kinds of posts described can get a bit annoying. But the author isn’t giving us any wiggle-room here. Let me give you an example: Lucy broke her wrist. She belongs to a couple of sporting clubs, goes to university and works part-time at a large organisation where she has many friends. She uses Facebook as a quick and easy way of telling her close friends, college friends, sporting friends, colleagues etc. that she’ll be out of action for a few weeks:

    “Broke my wrist! 6 weeks in lockdown. Boo :(“

    According to the author, this is attention seeking behaviour, with a little hint of horribly infectious loneliness.

    How else could she post this?

    “I have broken my wrist and will not be working, attending class, seeing my friends or playing sport for at least 6 weeks. Any comments or messages should be directed to my private inbox.”

    That’s beautiful – and I think, I hope that follows Rule #1 for Facebook posting (interesting/informative). Unfortunately, it’s in violation of Rule #2 (funny/amusing/entertaining). I’m afraid Lucy isn’t much of a jester!

    Let’s say Lucy wants to spread some happiness. According to the author, quoting life truths is deemed image crafting, and of course, narcissism. So where else can she find happiness? How about within her own life? Brilliant! Why doesn’t she spread some joy by sharing the little things that made her happy today? N-O, says the author. That would just be blatant – you guessed it – narcissism.

    As I said, it all comes down to what we want Facebook to be. If you want interesting and informative pieces of news, go to a current affairs website. If you want to be entertained, then YouTube away my friend! But if you want to stay in touch with people you know (regardless of the closeness of your relationship), then Facebook is great for that – but personally, I’d say that those who are only interested in knowing if you are engaged/alive aren’t worth knowing at all. Let’s not forget, Facebook is made up of humans, who live their own lives but at the same time have feelings and want to be social. Just like in real life. Who would have thought?

    • Anonymous

      LOL. Lucy’s revised post that conforms to the author’s standards had me laughing for a good bit. I agree with everything you’ve said!

    • don banana

      maybe ur taking it seriously when its not? imho hes just pointing some of the more usual posts and making fun of them, actually if you take out these 7 kind of posts ur facebook frontpage would b almost empty

  15. The Undercover Brag

    “On my walk home from work, I was whistled at twice, honked at twice, and one car almost caused an accident slowing down to stare at me. Sometimes I really hate men. “

    Most women aren’t bragging about creepers making them feel uncomfortable for no reason other than the fact that they are female. If you’re seeing stuff like this, it’s because it genuinely upsets them. (And no, it’s not a compliment and no they shouldn’t learn to just accept it).

    • YES. I was really bothered that the author thinks that women speaking out against sexual harassment is really just an excuse for them to humblebrag about being attractive. Gross.

  16. You know what this article is best for? Identifying all of the people who take themselves far too seriously. This is a clever and astute critique that articulates what most people I know are thinking. Sorry if you feel “called out.”

  17. Ur doing it rong. Don’t have 800 “friends” on Facebook. Edit! There is no need to friend everybody and their grandmother. I have nobody on there that I can’t stand when they do any of the above, and as much as FB will let me I will try to spare at least some sections of my limited pool of friends when I am being annoying myself. Not that hard.

  18. Really, this is spot on. Anyone who claims to not get it, or is pissed off by the article either writes shit themselves on Facebook and just doesn’t ‘understand’ that they are one of those people, or knows that they do and are embarrassed that someone has eloquently described their rubbish…

  19. Haha, that felt good to read! I totally agree with you. Granted, I don’t leave many status updates, one reason being that the DO go to all “800″ friends when I really only want those 10 or 20 to see it. Too bad FB doesn’t have a setting for that… or do they and I missed it?

    • Anonymous

      It does have a setting where you can choose your select audience. But first you have to group your friends list into groups eg family, acquaintances, work etc.then choose the group you want

  20. These long glorious days of summer….watermelon raspberries blackberrie diving into the ocean off the boat frozen mango yogurt watching silly movies with my thirteen year old till 2:00am morning geese gulls otters ducks blue heron daughter’s sparkling glitter toenails teenage drama soccer son’s marathon sleepovers with friends Don’s famous barbecue salmon dinners flower garden on the bow of the boat starlight moonrises shoting stars tree frogs cricket song morning runs up the mountain falling asleep to the gentle rocking of waves on the hull……

    (Now don’t you feel crappy about YOUR life? GOOD!)

  21. This gives me a great idea for a drinking game:

    Assign each of these 7 offenses to party attendees, and then they can only speak in that manner or they have to drink.

    I think it would be hilarious trying to craft my words as literal status updates ;) but I think I would have way more fun with the cryptic cliffhangers!

  22. Facebook also actually offers you the option to hide news and statuses from people you don’t care about. Make use of it! I tend to think, that people who don’t want to know anything about my life or don’t want to read my posts will have made use of that option already. So I’m not annoying anyone who doesn’t want to read my statuses, but only scribbling down what’s going on in my mind to people who give a fuck. So there’s a theory of mind that the author obviously didn’t take into consideration, which would modify the interpretation of the core motivation.

  23. i don’t think you understand facebook at all. fb isn’t reddit. it isn’t supposed to be about providing interesting and witty reading for other people. fb’s intended purpose is to do all of those things you’ve listed – it’s about the poster, not the postees.

    i highly recommend you do what many of us did long ago – quit. and perhaps practice what you preach and make your own writing more interesting and witty for your readers – after all, it’s not all about you. a curated community like the one you think fb should be would not accept all this whiny sarcasm…or approve of using the full names in the “daniel’s” post you’ve quoted.

    ps: you don’t have to be “friends” with people whose updates bore you. i don’t understand why people don’t get this.

  24. AJ

    I agree with maybe 25% of this article (>inb4 it’s a comedic piece). When someone posts something along the lines of “I finally got accepted into med school!” or “Finished my last exam!” that isn’t particularly bragging; it could be a sign of relief. Also if they are your friends who are posting these types of statuses then you shouldn’t get jealous you should be happy for them.

    On the other side, I completely hate the “ugh i hate my life…” statuses, or the vague fb posts. It’s so painfully obvious that they want attention.

    A simple solution: block all of their posts from showing up on your news feed (don’t have to necessarily unfriend them).

  25. Loved it all.
    Except, well, that example about the girl being honked and whistled at. I thought at first the author was a woman -for some obscure reason- but after reading that part I was sure it couldn’t be. Being honked at on the street is nothing to brag about, being harassed doesn’t mean you’re very attractive, you get the honking even when you’re 13 and ugly…just because you’re a girl on the street. A guy who honks at a girl certainly doesn’t have high standards, and the whole thing, I can assure you, doesn’t come out as a compliment. It’s pretty embarassing and humiliating.

  26. To the author: If you practically believe that all Facebook statuses are “narcissistic”, then delete your account because Facebook was not meant for people like you.
    You cannot judge that the motive behind all statuses is narcissism and vanity. Out of the 800+ friends on my FB (Which I actually know and have met in real life (No I am not bragging…SEE I CAUGHT YOU.)) about 5, are actually narcissists and post just to cultivate an image of themselves. So when I see friends posting “I’m going to Italy to study abroad for 3 months!” I take into consideration of the person behind the post…which happens to be a truly humble, optimistic, friendly person – who is HAPPY to be traveling to Italy. I could become one of two things 1) Jealous or 2) Happy. I choose to be happy for that friend. At the same time I am informed and enlightened after reading the exciting post.
    To me, it seems as if YOU are a very jealous and judgmental person. I am sorry that Facebook brings you so much strife and pain. I wonder what your statuses look like. Many people post to document, express their feelings etc. I’m sorry that you are so bothered and annoyed by certain, should I say MOST statues. Maybe we should follow your guidelines to better posting as to not offend you. I think you should just focus on YOU and stop judging other people and believing they are all out to promote and worship themselves. I bet you think having a profile pic is NARCISSISTIC. Do you have a profile picture? What AM I asking??!!… you probably don’t because you fear others might find you…vain.

  27. I really like that guys status. It made me smile. I got about 10% of the way through your bitching and moaning before I was thoroughly bored. I only receive status updates on facebook from people I know, so I like hearing their happy news. Sounds to me like you are a selfish prick who thinks his friends soul purpose in life is to entertain YOU

    • Anonymous

      I do see folks with 800-900 friends and they always seem to be the ones who blab the loudest. Nobody likes a loudmouth, so it’s a good thing they take their self-love kisses to Facebook rather than do this sickening act in public. To Hell with Facebook. Facebook junkies, get some help!

  28. I thought the points in this article were totally spot on, and from looking at the comments, what I see is people saying “I LIKE WHEN GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO MY FRIENDS!”

    Did you read the article? The whole point is that EVERYONE likes when good things happen to their friends.

    The article labels 7 particular kinds of Facebook posts which are “insufferable.” Only one of them is bragging (which is what comment protesters are about) and that one isn’t saying that incessant bragging will be annoying to your good friends, it’s saying it’ll be annoying to the other “96-99%” of your Facebook friends.

    Anyone who is that angry about this article didn’t read more than 10% of the article. Kudos to the author.

  29. Yeah think this was massively over-egged and self-indulgent (and narcissistic). Could have summed this up in a couple of paragraphs.

    But anyway, surely by FAR the worst must be the moronic ‘share’ status. The incessant “1 share = 1 dollar donated to [child dying of cancer/worthwhile cause/charity etc]” kind of bollocks that everyone seems to believe. Nonsense generated by corporations to sell facebook stock in likes for corporations. I find that people actually believing it and re-posting as a self-righteous do-gooding pander to karma more irritating than the appalling faceless corporate bastards behind them.

  30. Dang, people have some stroooooong feelings about this subject! Have to say, I do a couple of these–quotes, bragging… but overall this made me laugh my ass off. I have started unfollowing people who post pictures of their meals or their morning coffee. Too much.

  31. This is SO STUPID. Most of the stuff this guy was talking about, I DO NOT find annoying, and ACTUALLY ENJOY. It is people who write epically long papers about why annoying FB posts are annoying that makes the majority of us feel annoyed at them. I LIKE knowing that some of my FB friends had a great weekend with some other people, or that they are thinking of something big going on in the world, or that they are feeling particularly grateful for the people and things that surround us; It makes me smile.
    Most of (I would hope) find these things cheering, even if they give us only the knowledge that our friend, this living person on the other side of the screen, is still alive, and feeling the need to connect, feel, or in anyway be human.
    “that’s why insufferable Facebook behavior will never go away—there’s no dislike button or eye-roll button or middle finger button on Facebook” BECAUSE FB IS SUPPOSED TO BE A POSITIVE PLACE TO CONNECT WITH YOUR PEOPLE, WHETHER THEY LIVE NEAR OR FAR, AND REMEMBER THAT WE ARE ALL HUMAN.
    And if we have to write cryptically to get the connection we need, then so be it.
    The only thing I can find to take positively from this article, is a lesson on how to be a better human; Assume best intent. Remember that we are ALL human. Remember that No Matter how stupid, or annoying, or attention craving a post may be, it is there for a reason, and A PERSON put it there.

  32. “Thinking a status update is supposed to be an actual status update”

    It is. If you think otherwise, you’re using it wrong. The site that you’re looking for is MySpace…

    • Oops, commented before I got to the end.

      “it’s bad form to be too much of a dick in the comments below a status.”

      It’s not, really. In fact, I’ve pruned a lot of people that didn’t really need to be friended to me by being honest about their stupidity. If you’re not asking to be told you’re wrong, don’t broadcast your stupidity publicly. Update your status with everything else, sure.

  33. Did anyone else find it ironic that this person decided to denounce Facebook narcissism, which they define as the idea that “the author’s thoughts, opinions, and life philosophies matter”, on their personal blog? And if posting a status update that’s about yourself is narcissistic, what exactly is expecting that other people’s status updates be designed either you inform you with brilliant and original insights or make you laugh? You know, because other people’s Facebook posts are really just about you…

  34. Such a supercilious post! I’ve seen your type of criticism applied to any innocent activity that gives people some happiness. Grow up. If you don’t like people expressing themselves on Facebook, stop reading.

  35. I’ve identified what you didn’t: fret-gloating. People who fret about awesome decisions that take them away from their already awesome lives. The fret-gloat is only complete when the decision turns out to be even more awesome than expected by the friend, even though their friends understood it would. For instance, a friend who lives on a flower farm with white horses fretting over the decision to move to a tropical island for a year later posts about her engagement to an islander and their stellar house and life. Fret-gloating. I’m over it.

  36. To all who are ripping the author and the article:

    I think it’s a very well written and funny article that does point out many obvious reason people post on Facebook.

    Of course most posts are narcissistic, but that’s human nature. Of course that’s what people do on social media is talk about themselves; what else is there to do on social media? If you don’t like it, go away.

    You don’t have to agree with everything in the article. Even I don’t agree with a couple things, but the article is still on-point with the majority of people’s FB posts, and points this out in a very detailed and humorous manner.

    For example, I don’t agree with some parts of “the brag” like when people post pictures (vacation, kids, etc), because some of their their friends and co-workers might enjoy seeing these pictures and updates. I wouldn’t consider this gloating, selfish, or narcissistic; just merely keeping people in the loop. If you think about it, it’s not much different than someone bringing in physical pictures of their vacation or kids in a physical environment and showing everybody. Nobody is forcing you to look at the pictures. Nobody is forcing you to respond or like.

    I almost think the only reason you might be mad after reading this article is maybe because you feel bad for posting for these reasons for all these years.

    I totally agree with “cliffhanger” and “banana” examples. They’re annoying. But again, it’s human nature. People act like this in real life. This article isn’t telling anybody to change.

    I myself am occasionally guilty of these posts, but I’m okay with it. I like to think I’m over it. I post pics maybe cause I think they’re funny, maybe cause I’m bored, or maybe I know 1-2 people will get a good laugh out of a post. This doesn’t mean I’m gloating, bragging, or trying to show off. I’ll admit, sometimes I feel bad because I wonder if people might get jealous because of my posts; but that thinking alone is narcissistic and I feel like I’m just getting in my own head. I mean, it’s just not that serious. If you’re on FB, you post, you share, you read. People who don’t enjoy it will do something else. It is what it is.

    I appreciate the article, and the time and effort put into it. It’s right on. For someone to organize people’s reasons for posting, and getting it into words; that’s awesome.

    What I find somewhat fascinating, is that when FB first came out, it was more/less a big free-for-all, with no norms. Today, there are social-networking norms that most people adhere to. For example, I think a couple examples the author may have forgotten are people who go on political or religious rants, and others who want to market and capitalize on FB. I think these users are just uninformed, and don’t realize there’s other platforms to communicate these views on. Also, FB can be a good marketing tool if used appropriately, and people will seek out information. It’s evolving. People will seek it or drop it.

    If people don’t want to see other people’s babies they could get the baby.me app that turns babies into other cool pictures. If people don’t want to see people’s posts, they have the option to block, unfriend, or simply not log on.

    Yes, Facebook does make some people happy, but actually the latest research has shown that FB does the exact opposite, because you look at posts, and it makes you sad because people think about how their life lacks what the other FB users are posting/sharing, which makes them rethink their lives.

    That still doesn’t make this a bad article, just because it points out some obvious things people do on social media and makes people angry. I enjoyed the read. Don’t agree with all of it Some examples are right on. I thought it was hilarious!

    • Anonymous

      so now there’s rules to this? lol. It’s FB. Get on , say whatever you want to say to your circle of friends and aquaintances…if they like it, they can hit the button for that or they can keep on scrolling.

  37. I mostly find this article insufferable. There are some good points, but mostly my impression is, why should I craft my Facebook page for you? My goal isn’t to get the most likes for my status. I’m just doing my thing, Guy. Get your fascist Facebook judgments off of me.

  38. Anonymous

    I have never- not even once- posted a comment on a blog. ever. and I just have to say how brilliant and hilarious this article is. pure and utter genius. those of you with all of the negativity: first, slap yourself in the face. second, go delete that status update that tells us what you cooked for dinner, what glass of wine you have in your hand, how many calories you burned today, and how blessed you are. #noonecares

  39. NF

    i don’t get annoyed by social media, i don’t know, i think i see it as something so trivial that no facebook/twitter status would be annoying enough for me. i guess tags / mentions can be annoying, but facebook statuses are the user’s right, he/she can say whatever he/she wants really

  40. Anonymous

    While initally amused at this article, I ended up asking, but,,why? Why these rules so that you dont get annoyed? Why create and spread this type of unacceptance. for by publishing it for those to read you have created an intolerance ‘disease’ – anyone who has read it will now identify those all things you have higlighted and join in your annoyance where they may not have before.
    YOU ARE SPREADING INTOLERANCE, which ultimately leads to division and hatred. Well done!

  41. Anonymous

    This is pretty amusing, and I agree with the irritation over a lot of these “types” of status updates. Especially the posts that, in reality, a person’s mom wouldn’t even care about (ie, “going grocery shopping” or “on my lunch break”). But there is a bit of a contradiction between what is being said in the “enlightenment” section and the bragging section–why not post about something you’ve accomplished? Because that would apparently also be annoying, right? I personally don’t mind seeing people post their accomplishments–getting into med school, having a child, completing a marathon–because they ARE accomplishments, major feats in life, major milestones, moments of joy. They’re at least POSITIVE. Anything that distracts people or prevents them from whining/pointless updates seems like it’s a good thing.
    Also, here’s a thought: don’t have 800 friends, 500 of which don’t give a shit about your accomplishments because they barely know you anyway. Why can’t the people we’re “friends” with also coincide with the people that actually care about us?

  42. *sigh*

    Although I agree that some FB updates really take the piss – especially about humblebragging and self promo – it isn’t all about YOU (and that goes for the commenters that are ‘defending’ the writer also).

    The real problem is having 800 odd people who don’t care if you drop off the planet. You’re using Facebook as Twitter or as others have said Reddit…it’s not supposed to be a place for meeting random acquaintances you’ve never met – this is why it asks you ‘Have you met this person?’ when you add them?

    It’s supposed to be for close friends, family, people you know well. Yes you CAN use it for everyone including the guy down the coffee shop and the weird stalkerish person and the person you kind of fancy from Timbuktoo, but then don’t kvetch about depersonalisation, alienation, pointless updates and not being engaged. Reduce that friends list down to people you give a fuck about, and hey! Problem solved…ie. stop looking to others to solve your own issue with your Facebook group, and posting another Google/sharebait “Why Social Media Sucks!’ list.

    This is exactly the same post as back in the day people blogged about how Livejournal, Blogger etc. sucked – same issues, same problems, different labels. They also told people to be ‘entertaining’ and stop posting in their journals like they were a diary (like the ‘using a status update like a status update’ – that’s what they were intended for!) and quite rightly people told them to go fuck off, it’s their space and they will do with it what they will, either read it or GTFO. Same applies here. *shrug*

    Oh and those who accuse others of doing same, I’m sure you can find me online, you’ll notice I do very few of these things, but I’m sure you can find something ‘narcissistic’ if you look hard enough…LOL.

  43. Anonymous

    The only thing that bugs me about this is the sad truth that most people care more about whether someone is engaged than whether they are doing well at work. Why shouldn’t one’s friends care about another’s day to day life?

    I couldn’t care less when someone “commits” to yet another future divorce, but I think it’s rad when my friends kick ass at work. Most relationships fail, but career is forever.

  44. Anonymous

    Things that probably already have been said in the comments, but the narcissist in me can’t help giving my opinion. So here it is:

    Isn’t FB about sharing your life with your friends and relatives?
    I don’t have 800 facebook “friends”, rather 100. Knowing that they are happy makes me happy, not jealous.
    Not all of them are close, but I bet that more than 5% of them care about me. And if FB algorithms are working as expected, those who don’t care about me will likely not see my status updates as often as those who do.

  45. Your analysis is conditional. If I am truly, truly friends with the poster, then I want to know all about his/her life. Those that are close to me: please post everything.

    On the other hand, those that are not, please don’t post that stuff–or just a little of it.

    To me, annoying are things that are made up–urban legends–and offensive language

  46. Ken

    HAH! It’s funny, because it’s so spot-on true. I’m going to immediately tell everyone about this article, and then get some lunch, tell them all about it, then take a nap, wake up and describe the dream I had, then spend an entire afternoon combing the online world for banality which I will point out ON PURPOSE to people who could not, in a trillion years, care any less about it. Ah yes, that’s the good stuff.

  47. Damo

    Amusing post. I think it’s important to do a yearly recycle of your facebook ‘friends’. I like to keep around 30 friends in total. Made up of real friends and family.
    Using this list of annoying status posts would be a good way to sack people.

  48. Anonymous

    Posting Proverbs 3:5-6 may be image crafting, but it’s the complete opposite of narcissism. Trusting in God rather than yourself… poor choice as an example by the author.

  49. Anonymous

    For the most part a pretty comprehensive and funny list.

    A few comments on some of the 7 points:

    1c) Depends on the relationship. Sometimes one feels obligated to do this from time to time depending on how emotionally needy one’s partner is.

    4) Parents and social media newbies seem most susceptible to this. I chalk it up to naïveté –i.e. not knowing how to “do” FB–more than narcissism.

    5) Does this include the blanket “thank you” post most of us feel somewhat obligated to make the day after receiving a ton of birthday wishes? If so this is more laziness and/or a sense of obligatory politeness than it is narcissism.

    7) Totally. Bugs the shit out of me. Canned quotes from the Dalai Lama or are the dryer lint of the internet.

    Personally I like seeing my friends’ pix so I guess that makes me lame and boring. But it sure beats having them upload to Snapfish or some other “service” where I’m going to have to create yet another goddamned account.

    800 friends? NOBODY has 800 TRUE friends. Not even the Dalai Lama. If you have 800 “friends” you have bigger problems than the 7 points on this list. OTOH the assertion that nobody has more than 15-30 people at most who love them is a pretty dark and pessimistic view of life. While it’s highly unlikely anyone would have hundreds of people who truly “love” them it really depends on the size of your family, the size and quality of your community, and the number of years you’ve spent building them.

  50. Anonymous

    Yeah, this is why I don’t make facebook statuses anymore; for fear of being judged just like this.
    Why do other people’s facebook statuses have to please YOU? Let people share what they want, it’s not their fault you find them annoying.

  51. Anonymous

    Oh boo hoo, it must be so hard to scroll past and ignore someone else’s facebook status that is slightly displeasing to you.
    Why do you have to be so judgemental? Why does it actually matter if other people want attention? Because it’s annoying to you? Well you’re annoying me.

  52. Anonymous

    I have a different view on all of this just the way how Facebook organizes information. I don’t post for anyone other than me – I use Facebook as that one point where all the crap I go through gets collected so I can check it some later time. I post a lot of articles etc, but I actually haven’t read any of them since I’ll get to that when I have more time.

    Now when it comes to status messages and photos – FB has a great way (especially when you tag the photo locations) or mapping all those little photos and status messages to a certain location on the map (“Places”). Now, when one tries to live a pretty adventurous life (living in another country etc), you tend to gather a lot of these tidbits of photos, status messages and whatnot. So over the years, you tend to build a pretty detailed picture of your timescale.

    Now, obviously stuff gets forgotten by whoever uses Facebook – even stuff from 2 years ago is almost ancient history, especially if you experience a lot. Back home, I have big wall in one room that has a massive world map tapestry in it, printing one with the the size and detail required wasn’t a small task. On this tapestry, I transfer the key things out of whatever location I’ve visited or experienced and it’s all based on whatever pictures etc I post in facebook.

    I don’t use Facebook to brag or compare lives or any of that crap – everyone needs to find their own happiness. I use Facebook to build that wall so we have a visual timeline in our house for our family, especially our daughter since she probably doesn’t remember any of this stuff when she grows older.

    So especially that all encompassing “What a wonderful year this was” -post… I do that every year, have done ever since Facebook was launched. It just helps me sum up the year and what was special about it, so when we do the wall updating (The real wall!), this is the first point of contact to go to.

    Obviously, what’s written in the article is only the writer’s point of view – but to me it feels a bit glass-half-empty -thinking that if people describe their life via FB and it seems very adventurous or exciting, that those people are automatically some kind of major assholes. In that case, maybe a break from FB might be in order :)

  53. I have a hard time taking seriously the criticisms of a writer who goes into great detail about how selfish and vain others’ Facebook posts are, when his core reasoning for criticizing these statuses is “the things you say on your OWN facebook should be more beneficial to ME ME ME than to yourself.” That’s actually pretty self-centered and bitter in its own right. Other people’s success makes me happy for them, not angry. And if they’re post-bragging to benefit themselves, then it’s sad that all the wonderful things in their life aren’t uplifting on their own, and I hope they learn to get past that.

    For those people whose posts DO frequently bother me, I either hide their posts or–if it’s especially terrible–unfriend them. I don’t passive-aggressively quote their post and tear it apart ad nauseum like a bitter high school cheerleader.

    Then again, that’s just me.

    • Anonymous

      Agree. If they post something about having their promotion or passing the boards for example, I feel happy for them and I don’t fake congratulate them. If it makes you feel jealous then maybe something is wrong with you. And also, people who brags indefinitely in facebook and are annoying tends to be annoying in person too, so why befriend them?
      Delete them on your account!

  54. Anonymous

    There may be something else at work here. I sometimes feel that many people, faced with many choices, pick one communication tool and use it for everything. There’s a lot of stuff that shouldn’t go out by Facebook, but then there’s a lot of stuff that shouldn’t go out by email, or one’s blog, or whatever.

    That said, this article is probably why I hardly ever do anything on Facebook. FB seems to be composed primarily of stuff that no one cares about, except for those who would already know. If there’s something about my life that comparative strangers would really want to know, it’s probably on the news, told better than I could tell it.

  55. Anonymous

    Anybody who spends this much effort being bothered by some innocuous posts on social media really needs to rethink their priorities, perhaps visit a therapist to get rid of that nagging sense of self-loathing and insecurity. Yeah I don’t care if it’s supposed to be funny, but look at this poor guy, he puts so much thought into it, it’s clearly true for him on some level.

  56. This article is complete GENIUS! I wish I wrote it because it perfectly explains exactly what I find so objectionable about so many FB posts. And obviously the people who are commenting that they hate this post are seeing a liiiittttle too much of themselves here. You rock!

  57. Anonymous

    What about random song lyrics posts? Would those be in the “The Step Toward Enlightenment” category? Its definitely narcissistic, because Daniel thinks his taste in music, or art, is more profound, and he can see the “deeper” meaning of the lyrics that no one else can. Personally, those posts annoy me the most.

    PS. This is an amazing article. Loved every bit of it, and I think we share the same opinion of the topic. And I might have found myself in some of those categories… oops.

  58. Anonymous

    I will now be sharing my opinion of cake and the weird smelling lockers at the gym more often, perhaps directly to your FB page, so I can continue to feed your twice weekly “cry for attention” “Look how clever and sarcastic I am! LOOOOOK!” blogging habit.
    Also, good luck in N Korea. Thanks for posting the announcement of that super awesome trip that we can’t wait to hear about!

  59. Anonymous

    interesting article. great point that people sometimes seem to have less and less awareness of the relevance of their postings to their audience…unfortunately there seems to be a trend now also of facebook like behavior spreading to other forms of communication (mass texts sharing pictures of cute things or asking for opinions about trivial things like what color socks to buy, or emails with no subject and no text, only containing a link to an article) How ironic that with the advent of so many social media tools that people’s ability to communicate seems to be degenerating…

  60. Anonymous

    apparently, many people are not aware that they can categorize their Facebook friends as how they can categorize their friends and acquaintance. *rolls eyes*

    rule of categorizing:
    1. make sure your boss and parents are separate category from your friends
    2. make sure you can make the right people suffer from your posts
    3. make sure your working mate cannot see your blunders

    image crafting is important for career.

  61. Anonymous

    lol, this is excellent!

    talking to God or dead people falls into #4?

    I find soooo annoying people saying happy birthday or hi to dead relatives/friends.

    WHYYYYY!!??? like they had FB…

  62. I thought this was great. The author left out a very special kind of annoying status update that I believe falls into category #6: the “RIP (insert name of celebrity who just died)”

  63. Anonymous

    The thing you read over and over that made you rage? It wasn’t for you! It was for the people named in the post! It was to tell his girl he loved her and his friends he had a great time with them that year. That’s a post that you post to be like “hey friends, I care about you and value your time!” so of course some random chucklefuck who isn’t invested in your personal life at all since you’re a stranger wouldn’t give a shit.

    But let’s tear this bullshit down further..

    1, the brag: you use another example wherein the posters friends are tagged. As I said above, the post is for them as a group – they’re sharing a memorable moment, and even if it is “braggy” who doesn’t like seeing that their friends are having a good time? Jerks. That’s who. OP is a jerk. 1b, one of the examples used is going on a trip and asking if anyone knows someone who wants to rent their place while they’re gone. That is a legitimate request. Chances are, this persons friends already know their friend has this place, so it’s not bragging to say it exists for rent. It’s also safe to assume that friends are already aware of the trips their buddy takes if they are taken often enough. 1c, ok, that does get irritating, but everyone is that irritating when they’ve just been bitten by the love bug, irl and online. Maybe you’re incapable of love or friendship? That would explain this post.

    I’ll agree that 2, the cliffhanger, is just the op begging for attention, and that it’s annoying, but the kind of people that post those are doing it on purpose as a call for help. Usually when someone posts things like that, they mean “I need comfort, please send kind words” and a real friend would understand that, take the bait and ask what happened, and offer a shoulder to cry on or services as an assassin.

    3, literal statuses, can be for two things: 1, sharing with friends who, one can assume by virtue of their friendship, give a shit about your life, and 2, letting them know where you are. 2 is important here since it can serve both as an invitation to meet up if you’ll be nearby, or as a warning that you’ll be busy so contacting you during that period will probably fail. Friend stuff. Sure, it’s not important to know the whereabouts of some stranger, but as I said, these posts are for FRIENDS.

    • Anonymous

      4, public private messages. Ok, some of these are annoying as balls. The first example kind where the post is obviously targeted toward one person in particular are irritating and I make it a point to troll those posts, but posts about enjoying time with your kids/friends? It’s safe to assume your friends care that you’re having fun with friends/family. Also, injokes… INJOKES ARE FOR FRIENDS YOU LONELY FUCKTRUMPET.

      5, the thank you speech, is…. do I even need to say it? They’re thanking their FRIENDS for being proper friends. And they’re not “out of nowhere” at all. Generally these sorts of posts come after some sort of ordeal or epiphany that warranted them.

      6, obvious opinions. It’s your wall, post your opinions. That’s what it’s there for. And not all opinions are obvious. 7, quotes and ponderings, like #6, are opinions but some of them are ones other people said that you agree with.

      “he sliced through my soul, accomplishing nearly every terrible status type and motivation discussed above. The thing is, though, that if you looked right below his post, all you saw were likes and a couple friendly comments.”

      Gasp and alarm! Dan’s friends and family care about his life! Who would have thought! Humans… -like- when good things happen to people they like!

      There’s a really simple way to avoid the posts you hate. Stop reading strangers facebook posts. Stick to the one or two people in your monkeysphere that you actually can muster fucks to give about.

      Plus you missed the obvious fuckawful post types: people who cycle the same 3-4 posts over and over, people who share a million images of text with bullshit hipster quotes, and people who play Zynga games.

  64. Anonymous

    From Facebook’s Login page:

    “Facebook helps you CONNECT and SHARE with the people in your life.” (emphasis: mine)

    It’s interesting how people who hate/disagree with the article are automatically called out as narcissists, and the poster is immediately labeled bitter and selfish (though I admit that I have a hard time seeing the “joke” part in the tone of his writing, especially after reading his own comment on the post). I think we have all fallen to our own form of narcissism by forgetting that Facebook was made for EVERYONE to “connect and share” (not inappropriate or spam content, of course) and thinking that we have the right to tell others what they can and cannot share and with whom (again, barring the inappropriate or spam). It’s narcissistic to push our individual opinions of what is and isn’t annoying on everyone else. We’re all annoyed by different things. Yes, people can be annoying on Facebook. I’d rather someone be annoying in a place where I can ignore them rather than face-to-face.

  65. Anonymous

    This entire article is based on the assumption that your friends on facebook are no actual friends but mere acquaintances. Maybe only allow people to see your posts that are involved in your life and refer all the others to your linkedin account.
    Alexandra

  66. Anonymous

    Very interesting analysis in that article !

    However, having a social existence always require image crafting and attention craving. And lets be honest, you often need a bit of narcissism and jealousy inducing to attract people attention.

    But you’re entirely true. It’s all about having the good public, as you should be doing those things for the right people, the one surrounding and caring. Certainly not your 800 friends.

    Thanks for the funny reading. See, that was from a good “Region B” Facebook post .. ; )

  67. There’s a lot being said in the article and in the comments. So of course I want to share an opinion as well :) I think the reasons listed in the article and everything else in article, and in the comments, is why Facebook exists. There’s no “right” way to use Facebook and well we get what we get. If you actually know the people who you’re friends with on Facebook, are you really all that surprised by what they’re posting?

  68. Anonymous

    All photos are insufferable? This is the point where I stopped reading this article, and started seeing this author as someone who should delete his or her profile.

  69. Anonymous

    The author breaks it down and tells it like it is…thank you for making me realize humans aren’t perfectly informative or funny all the time because being interesting all the time is what makes life interesting right?

  70. I feel like hundreds of people missed the point of the article and overreacted. I knew the point of this before I even got to:

    “The bigger point here is that the qualities of annoying statuses are normal human qualities—everyone needs to brag to someone here and there, everyone has moments of weakness when they need attention or feel lonely, and everyone has some downright ugly qualities that are gonna come out at one time or another.”

    Relax. Laugh a little.

  71. Anonymous

    Its funny but whatever one comments on your article can also be interpreted as someone trying to be wise/funny/self important etc etc.:), but I really loved this article, it expresses most of what I feel about fb. one thing I was thinking of was, when you mention the wisdom quote point, that people think they are making some amazingly wise point, it really really annoys me when they copy paste someone else s spoken or written words as their own and never bother to reference it. really really annoys me. one-we didn’t need to know your personal favorite quote/words every single day and even if you do subject us to it, please atleast do the courtesy of quoting the source, you have other people liking your status as if it were born out of your own ‘creative’ mind!not done!!!

  72. Anonymous

    Facebook is the way to open ours thoughts about what are some of the daily things we do ,want to do ,think about ,and also is the space where people can ask each other to be friend .Facebook is the part of our life ,it keeps us in touch with our friends ,by seeing what they do or plan to do .

  73. Anonymous

    I think the author of this blog post did a brilliant job codifying just about everything that has driven me from Facebook. What a huge pile of narcissistic, egomaniacal, boring wank the whole thing is…

  74. “Secondly—you know what inspires people? You achieving something incredible and letting it be an example and inspiration to others.”

    But don’t post about it– that’s narcissistic!

    The author has confused Facebook with LinkedIn or the New York Times perhaps. Facebook is an online school hallway or workplace water cooler. Everything this ass complains about is EXACTLY what Facebook is for.

    Don’t like it? Then stop friending people you don’t give a fuck about, idiot.

  75. Somehow I just recall one weibo posted by Wang Xiaochuan Monday, CEO of Sougou, which was really ambiguous, yet got hundreds “Like”. What really matters is who you are or who is reading.

  76. K10

    The most ironic thing about this post? People are posting it on Facebook. So the butthurt author is getting attention through the social media outlet he/she claims to hate. Bless their heart.

  77. Anonymous

    Lots of people seem a bit, uh, butt-hurt by this. It’s like they’ve been called out on participating in the whole ridiculous Facebook affair and the 90% of it that is essentially about acting like you’re in Middle School. Which is kind of funny.

  78. Anonymous

    Funny, because it’s all true.

    But at the same time, it can say a lot about the “receiving end” of the behavior described.

    [brag?]I myself am usually happy when someone on my FB (all of whom I know in person) says they finished their thesis, or their child did something cute, or they are going on a cool trip, or whatever.[/brag]

    Are you annoyed because one of your friends is doing well or is happy? Hm, interesting…

    OK, they might be faking the happiness, image crafting or whatnot. Well, their problem. If they tell me their life is awesome, I will believe them, think “good for you”, and go on with my life.

    The inspirational ones are a bit annoying to me, so I just ignore them — unless they are ironical/parody/sarcastic/all of the above. After two or three words one already knows to skip, right? (which might make you unjustly skip a parody one, but one usually knows which friends will commit each, so that’s all good)

  79. Anonymous

    This article is amazing! Hilarious AND truthful. All of you people who disagree with it are probably guilty of at least 6 of these 7 offenses.

  80. Okay.
    A: This post is a HUGE Number 7. Yes, the sun IS bright! The target audience knows it, and only the dull-blades among them will be thankful to the author for pointing it out.
    B: That opening “email from a friend” is a GIGANTIC Number 1B. Okay, so you’re young and happening and you live in New York and your pals are pals with pals who hang with Owen Wilson and go to $600-a-plate Democratic fundraisers.
    C: So yeah, this post is a hideous example of most of the shit for which the author is feigning worldly contempt.
    Thanks for nothing.

  81. Anonymous

    I managed to get through this article despite the salty language.

    Most of the things you dislike about your friends’ posts are the very things that I want to know.

    This paragraph says it all: (quote) > “People who don’t love you don’t care about you or your day or your life that much, they’re probably not especially rooting for you, and they certainly want nothing to do with your worst qualities. And you doing something purely to serve your emotional or egotistical needs really should not show up on their computer screen—it just shouldn’t.” (end quote)

    If you don’t love someone and don’t care about him, then why did you become his “friend”? When I submit a friend request to someone, it is precisely because I do care about that person, and I am interested in what she is doing and thinking about. And I expect that anyone who sends me a friend request feels that way about me.

  82. Anonymous

    it’s an opinion piece and totally subjective. everyone stop crying and stop taking social media so seriously. IT’S NOT REAL LIFE. that’s why it’s funny.

  83. Anonymous

    OMG, that was hilarious. I laughed out loud! Ok, that was image crafting.. I didn’t laugh at all… but I did inwardly. I’m a happy person…

  84. Anonymous

    i like it. especially the idea of an roll button or f you button.

    although callus and negative i could see some positive strokes to guide those who dont know.

    But i id enjoy the fact that i am one of those doing all 7 in my total relationship with FB.

    I have stepped away from FB for a time and it was the best thing ever. my life got better LOL.

    the greatest part of this article the comment on human nature and a sign of our desperate

    culture which is socializing narcissistic behavior as normal. Cultivating great content and

    should be some good rules on how to for those need it.

    thank you

  85. Anonymous

    You missed out one of the biggest – checking in at international airports. Why oh why would anyone do that! (why would anyone check in anywhere???)

  86. Amy

    Just to be clear, the only acceptable (or not ‘insufferable’) Facebook post is one that serves YOU, amuses YOU or educates YOU?

    Well if that ‘aint narcissistic, I don’t know what is.

    For me, an insufferable Facebook post is one that links to a negative and ignorant blog post like this one.

  87. Anonymous

    I totally agree with the author.
    I don’t post all that crap, ever! I use facebook to post a few pics of me and chat up chicks (using the messenger) so I can shag them. There you go, this is the truth plain and simple, and I bet a lot do exactly the same.
    I don’t even read people’s status, I only look for hot bikini pictures and location updates so I know where I can go “randomly” meet them.
    If I want to share with my family I upload albums on picasa.

  88. Anonymous

    Fantastic article, I think that he’s dipped into most of the selfish type attributes that Facebook users bring about on the website – these come typically from a selfish human gene that we all carry. Some of of us treat this gene lightly and others banish the thought of it completely. Personally I think this article is a good code to follow for people to start realising that life should be more about living ones life for others, and putting others first, caring and asking how their day was and how their life is going rather than blatantly over advertising our own ego’s and trying to drill perceptions into other peoples heads that mean nothing to anyone else other than themselves.

  89. Anonymous

    The biggest puzzle here is the fact that people can actually contrive to be annoyed by a social website in which have the choice of participating. Clearly everyone is annoyed at themselves for being doofus enough to waste their lives online.
    If using Facebook for its intended purpose annoys you, then stop using it.

  90. Anonymous

    Just so all you new mothers know, nobody but you and your mother give a flying fuck about your baby. It’s in the green zone. We don’t need to be bombarded with pictures of your childs first shit, first vomit, first wank, first whatever.
    Your child is not the most amazing little snookywooky or whatever the hell nauseating crap you want to call it. It’s one of millions of other snotty little shit factories the rest of us only care about when it’s being too noisy.

  91. Anonymous

    Lotta people butthurt about being called out for their annoying Facebook habits. It is funny because there is an element of truth in it…

    • Anonymous

      Very true – their own little ox has been gored. In any case, people really need to lighten up; this essay is intended to be funny, which it is. To become hysterically angry over this is really, really weird.

    • Anonymous

      The author wrote this as a kneejerk response to his own crippling jealousy. End of story.

      Several Decembers in a row, n lieu of a Christmas card, my cousin sent an 8-page missive filled with glossy photos of everything she did with her wonderful husband and beautiful children that year. It was sickening. I finally stopped opening them, knowing the dark self-loathing place these letters sent me to (and right before Christmas, how jolly). Since Facebook began, I’ve found more people like my cousin, and if while reading their updates, I feel myself going to that place, I hide their stuff.
      My jealousy is mine to work through.

      In the end, when you read about others’ “perfect” lives on Facebook, the only person responsible for making you feel like crap is you. Own it and deal with it. You’ll feel better.

    • Anonymous

      I agree, lots of people criticizing this article frankly don’t seem to understand that not only do they not have to take this seriously, but end up insulting this article and being defensive for whatever reason, as if they want to say that other facebook users can’t have a different opinion on how to use facebook. Which is extremely ironic.

  92. Anonymous

    Wow. The butt-hurt haters in this thread, criticizing the author of this post, are quite the special little snowflakes. They are also obtuse, because they missed the point of this article; the author wasn’t ridiculing people who post life events on Facebook – only the folks who are boastful show-offs. These butt-hurt special little snowflakes in this thread need to check their privilege, and they need to put this article in perspective – it’s only a jab at boastful people, and not a tragedy such as 9/11. Grow up.

  93. Anonymous

    It’s funny you know. If I want to post, I think about all my FB friends and what they’d think about my post. For instance, I have some friends that are struggling to make mortgage payments so the last thing I’m going to do is ‘checkin’ at Sydney Airport on my way to my overseas holiday. I have friends that are going through divorces so I’m not going to write dappy things about my happy marriage. I have friends that can barely afford a nice meal, so I’m not going to post about spending $400 on organic food. I have a friend dying of cancer so I’m not going to tell FB about my pissy first world problems. These are the reasons I don’t post on FB. I know a woman who posts and brags constantly about her overseas trips, half her friends have no money to even contemplate a local trip away. I find it disgusting and arrogant. I put it down to this. People who brag about holidays and material things, were brought up with nothing. 99% of my FB friends who behave like this have come from nothing. My privileged friends, NEVER write a word about 6 sleeps until Europe…..etc etc. It’s just the same old pattern. The braggers have no class. My parents brought me up to never boast about what you have.

    • Anonymous

      You, anonymous person, in this anonymous person’s humble opinion, absolutely nailed the matter in the head. That’s what narcissism is at its essence. That one’s life is so interesting that you don’t really have to regard the thoughts or situations of others. The damn thing (Facebook) is ridiculously American.

      I think the whole Facebook concept sort of has evolved neatly from Gen-Y issues – these kids grew up being told how special they are and they really have trouble thinking that someone else would not care that they are currently at the airport in Amsterdam or whatever…

  94. Narcissism. The author’s thoughts, opinions, and life philosophies matter. (e.g. a 3,000+ word diatribe of how most of what people choose to share with their friends is insufferable).

  95. Anonymous

    Ha ha! Great article and I like the use of Venn and other diagrams to illustrate. I’ll stick to my cat-picture posts & unoriginal thoughts but will be more conscious from now on. Personally, the cliffhanger and the humble brag (1b and 2, respectively) are my pet hates and I hide from my timeline statuses that do that and unfriendly a person if they’re a persistent offender. Also, not on the list (or perhaps you can help me categorise ) is the ignorant idiot a la white whine / first world problems.

    The added benefit of this article is that many of the vitriolic comments that totally miss the humour mark are, in themselves, hilarious!

  96. Anonymous

    What’s funnier: the article itself? Or the amount of defensive butt hurt in the comments, from people who are quite obviously guilty of doing all the things the article points out due to their weakness, narcissism and insecurity?

  97. Anonymous

    Its a genuinely funny article and whats funnier is there are so many people who are getting offended because they do this kind of shit everyday. Suck it up people. We all go through this but some of us are just too arrogant to accept it. INTROSPECTION time people.

  98. “On my walk home from work, I was whistled at twice, honked at twice, and one car almost caused an accident slowing down to stare at me. Sometimes I really hate men. “

    This is most definitely NOT a undercover brag. It has obviously never happened to you. Constant cat-calling and so-called “complimenting” like being hooted at just makes you feel on display to the world. It’s a re-enforcing a power dynamic.

    If it truly was compliments it would only happen when you looked your best. It doesn’t. It happens because you are a women.

    If you do this – stop. I don’t need to be told that some random man thinks “I’d tap that”. You know what? I don’t want you to.

  99. Anonymous

    I really don’t get the point of posting stuff on FB that is intended to make people jealous. If you have an achievement, people who care about you can know about it through phone calls or text messages. The people, on your friend-list, you can’t call or text don’t really give a hoot about it since they are the ones with whom you haven’t been in touch and it doesn’t matter to them what you accomplish in life. So the point of attention craving and jealousy inducing status messages is plain bragging, which is wrong.

  100. Anonymous

    Whilst boldly pretending to reveal something new or witty, this insufferably long and pseudo-intellectual article actually only amuses by displaying the whole range of character flaws the author feels so immune about.

  101. Anonymous

    This is so funny and true i just shared it on my fb to enlighten my friends… even the ones who don’t love me… just to let them know why the’re insufferable and make sure they keep doing it so FB has a chance to survive and i keep my nosy window on their crafted lives :)

  102. Anonymous

    I have a friend who doesnt have fb nor iphone nor cell phone. Funny thing is, when he wants to see a friend he visits him. Old ways

  103. May I please please please get your ok to translate this in Turkish? I really think some people on my newsfeed need to see this.. and be able to understand, you know.. You can keep the translated version here as another, linked post if you like. Reply to this if you’re up to it.

  104. Anonymous

    As a whole, you make some excellent points that hit at the heart of many issues, and your piece is entertaining and funny. That said, I have to disagree with no. 4 and no. 7.

    I take the time to express this because I didn’t read your post just to be casually amused but to actually learn, understand, and think critically about what is happening in culture because of Facebook. Essentially, a tool that promised to bring people closer together has instead become an adept reflector of some of humanity’s worst traits.

    My disagreement with no. 4 just reflects the reality that many of us have different conceptions of what Facebook and social media are for. I signed on to these things initially because I thought they were supposed to be about being “social” online-talking to and interacting with other people as opposed to just ignoring any other post that isn’t one’s own. So nothing makes me happier than to see people interact with other people’s posts because it demonstrates that someone cared enough to get off their own soap box and give a thought to another person instead of the every-man-is-their-own-island one-sided daily self-promotion approach that seems to be the norm. So, if a person tells another person that they miss them (your example above), I think that’s wonderful. I wish more people were that caring on social media. Of course, if the sentiment was genuine, they’d say it on the telephone, by email and/or in person. But if all this new technology has really become a part of our daily lives (and it has), then why wouldn’t we use it to communicate as we do with other modes of communication? It’s just another way to reach out to people. Somewhere along the line I noticed that there was a shift such that people were essentially viewing FB primarily as a means of disseminating information as opposed to interacting with other people (and talking to them online even in personal ways). Personally, I would rather interact with people online than have endless article suggestions or other information for consumption pop up in my feed (as the majority type of post). I’m working on a 2nd graduate degree, I swim in information daily and I have my own news sources. I don’t need any additional information recommended to me as Facebook’s *primary function or use. I do not view that at all as serving me as a “reader.” That isn’t what I used FB for. Again, I thought this was supposed to be about friendships and personal interactions. So when that actually happens on FB, I feel for once that things are right in the social media world.

    My disagreement with no. 7 stems from the fact that I think inspirational quotes are beneficial and encouraging. As someone who has written my own academic articles, I am capable at this point in my training of posting my own thoughts and insights, but I think that it would be a mistake and incredibly proud to think that we cannot learn from the insights and wisdom of others. So I am happy to see inspirational quotes in the newsfeed. In the past, these have really made my day.

    Lastly, I think you’re missing an important, annoying category! People who post about their pregnancies and/or children too frequently. I think this reflects a lot of narcissism and pride. The occasional post is fine, that’s just parental love. But more often than not, people do this to excess.

  105. Anonymous

    I like reading people’s good news and happy updates. It doesn’t look like bragging that often to me. There is so much negativity and doom and gloom in the world, I think it’s wonderful to see people expressing happiness and gratitude for good things in life. I also think that the obvious opinion is often necessary because you feel weird if you’re silent on a big tragedy. People are talking about it all over and you feel like a jerk if you don’t express some thought or care about it. Nothing wrong with showing support, I think.

  106. Anonymous

    Tip: Don’ read annoying posts on FB. If you do, stop thinking about it. If you think about it, stop writing down your thoughts. If you write down your thoughts, godamn stop posting them!
    Thanks for a list of unnecessary explanations about the reasons, why facebook-user are only human beings and 15 lost minutes of lifetime. (45 minutes, with this answer included)

    So,

    Number 8: The Criticizer

    Description: Let the others see, that you’re smarter than them by pinpointing their faults and misguided behaviour. For more self-esteem, add some arrogance!

    Example: See above

    Core reason: Attention craving, narcissism, loneliness.

    To make it short: Someone had a bad day, why not criticize people for what they do?
    Why it is annoying: Unnecessary, especially if the critic resembles the criticized. There are a lot of fails day in and out, get over it. At least, stop telling everyone.

    (Hope, someone understands the irony…)

  107. I thought this was more humorous than offensive. I would not internalize this article and directly change my facebook behavior. However, it can cause us to be a little bit more cognizant of the potential impressions our facebook statuses have on others. I appreciate this blog writer for her honesty.

    However, I just want to add that obviously the author exhibits some issues with jealousy. I don’t find myself being jealous of my followers when the post more the narcissistic posts. If anything I am proud of their achievement and it gives me something to work towards i.e. marriage, buying a new house. Maybe if you refocus how your perceive people’s intent you will not think of it so negatively.

    • Anonymous

      The author is not saying HE is jealous. He is saying that the writer of that particular FB post is writing it in the first place to try to illicit a response of jealousy.

  108. Anonymous

    This post hit the nail on the head for me. Now when people ask me why I closed my FB account I can point them to this!

  109. Anonymous

    Simple answer. Similar to the answer to censorship. If you don’t like it, don’t read it!!

    There are tools for that, the first of which is the delete button typically actuated by self control.

  110. Anonymous

    If someone has good news to share-won the lottery, enjoying a two week trip to Europe, getting married, graduating, getting a new job, having a baby or some other significant life event-why shouldn’t they share it?? If you get jealous or envious, that’s your problem and your issue isn’t it (insecure lately)?? Also, I would say that about half of FB status updates comprise the above complaints; but not everyone who posts those things are necessarily narcissistic. If they’re constantly posting stuff regularly-like more than 2-3 posts a day-with boring, braggy and/or just plain spammy info/photos, they could likely be narcissistic or seeking attention. If you have friends like that, then you can just ignore those posts, hide them or unfriend that person.

    A good rule of thumb is: if it’s a piece of info or photo you wouldn’t share with your good friends via regular email/snail mail – it’s probably not worth posting on Facebook!

  111. Anonymous

    This article is really funny and the author is probably right. But would I change the things I post on Facebook? Heck no! Because that’s what makes Facebook and even life in general more fun. All the silly things people had to see and hear about us. Wouldn’t it be terribly stifling if we all had to live all our lives just trying to do the “acceptable” thing?

  112. It’s a narcissistic era, and the point of FB seems to be to give public space to private discussion, like open email. Anyway, I think people’s conversations about themselves are often interesting – who cares if they are boasting! A person proud of him/herself is actually a good and beautiful thing, as long as the point of the pride is not to do someone else down. If you are secure in yourself, then someone saying “Arent’t I great?” shouldn’t be a challenge…and if you are not, FB’s not for you.

  113. Anonymous

    My favorite insufferable and desperate fb status:

    “Updating my LinkedIn profile. Realized all the professional photos I have of myself have beehives, horns, fur pants, PVC leather boots, guns, men’s facial hair, blood, zombie makeup, glitter, guns, and food smeared all over my face. Ah well! LinkedIn will read “Professional Administrator” with a badass picture of me with a rifle, Dirty Harry meets Janine from the Ghost Busters.
    …have I mentioned how proud I am of the people I get to work with and the amazing stuff I get to do?”

  114. Anonymous

    While it’s true that a lot of people’s statuses are annoying to read, it’s more ridiculous to me that a person is so agitated by it they have to write a whole manual on what is/isn’t ok to post on Facebook. Don’t want to read someone’s post? Keep scrolling. Don’t like what a particular person always posts? Delete them. Or un-follow their updates. It really takes little effort….it takes more effort to be an ego-tripping douche.

  115. Very insightful and accurate, helped me understand why FB posts can make me feel actually good or actually lousy – often, lousy. I shared your post and whooo is there a backlash! I think the guilty are reeling from sudden self-awareness and not liking it too much! I guess the truth hurts! (If you ever do a post about the overuse of emoticons and exclamation marks, I don’t want to know about it – I already have self awareness there and still can’t help myself.)
    :)
    Admiringly, Me.

  116. Anonymous

    Ha! This entire read was hilarious, comments and all! Maybe that guy is an asshole but he sure is funny. Thoroughly enjoyed and posted it on facebook. Shit I wonder does that make me a dick and how many likes will I get???

  117. The basic principle of this post is great – the online version of “think before you speak.” The details are a little silly. I wrote a response, 7 Ways to Get Over Yourself on Facebok: http://receptionist-the.blogspot.ca/2013/10/7-ways-to-get-over-yourself-on-facebook.html

    (Basic synopsis: you choose who you’re friends with on Facebook, you choose whether you’re on Facebook or not, so what you see on Facebook is up to you. You can’t control others, so deal with it or leave.)

  118. Anonymous

    Hilarious. It’s all true.

    Even the ‘humblebrag” thing about a woman getting honked at. Yes, sexual harrassment is super serious and no one should make light of it, which means facebook is not the place to talk about it unless you are actually making light of it. And there is even a way to talk about it without it coming across as bragging like that woman did.

    Go ahead and flame me and tell me I know nothing about sexual harrassment. >_>

  119. So funny! Yeah, I love the airport check ins…why do you need to inform everyone that you checked in for your flight? People have been checking in for years without having to inform the masses of their actions. It’s just another reason to brag…can’t we eat a meal, watch a movie, read a book…and just be “in the moment”?

  120. My name is Mr Cardenas,my wife was having affair with a senior secretary in her office. I love this woman so much that i would not want to share her with any body. i told her to retire from the job and i would take care of all her needs but she would take it because she is been embraced by everybody in her office, this normally leads to quarrel every-time. i tried all i can to please her and she will promise to be good , some days later she will turn back to her normal way.
    i was nearly loosing out, i could not focus in my job, my whole life was full of sorrow and i was thinking i should kill the other man my self and put an end to all this until i saw a testimony from a blog on how DR EDIONWE could cast a love spell to bring lovers back no matter what is behind the disappointment. so i decided to write him via email. edionwesolutiontemple@yahoo.com and now all my wishes are exactly as i wanted. She told me everything that has happened secretly in the past and i forgave her as DR EDIONWE instructed me to and she loves me and care for me as i ever wanted. i know there are many spells that do not work but i want to assure all you out there no matter what you have been trough to have faith and believe that this is the final solution to your problem.
    Even if my job is taking most of my time, the little free time i have , i will share the good news to everyone in the world because i know that with love brings happiness and hope for a long life.

  121. Anonymous

    This is just too funny. People simply think this and laugh to themselves because it is true among other articles you write. You do an amazing job expressing it in words what others want to say but don’t or can’t. Thank you for being the voice. Great website by the way. Enjoy the advice as well. People need to wise up and actually work for what they have. They need to start from the bottom and work their way up and not expect free hand outs. Otherwise, you won’t be successful and become unhappy.

  122. i want to thank Dr. Kasabubu for helping me re-uniting with my Ex Lover, i started dating him since 2009, i don’t know what happened he just end the relationship, i was in a great pain. i saw different post on how Dr. Kasabubu helped many people re-uniting with their Ex Lovers, i contacted him via email, i told him my problems, he told me that all my problems are over, he said that before he cast the spell that he will be needing to buy some items in which he will use, i sent him the money he casted the spell, he assured me that it will take three days before the spell will be effective, truly 3 days later, my Ex Lover rang me, i answered the call, he started apologizing, we are together now, he even bought me a new car. i am forever indebted to Dr. Kasabubu the great spell caster. you can get your Ex Lover through him, email him now on kasabubuspellhome@hotmail.com

  123. PreciousLevitte

    I am Precious Levitte, I promise to share this testimony all over the world once my boyfriend return back to me, and today with all due respect i want to thank Olorun for bringing joy and happiness to my relationship and my family. I want to inform you all that there is a spell caster that is real and genuine. I never believed in any of these things until i loosed my boyfriend, I required help until i found (Olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@gmail.com ) a grate spell caster, And he cast a love spell for me, and he assured me that I will get my boyfriend back in two days after the spell has been cast. two days later, my phone rang, and so shockingly, it was my boyfriend who has not called me for past 3 years now, and made an apology for the heart break, and told me that he is ready to be my back bone till the rest of his life with me. Olorun released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. As I’m writing this testimony right now I’m the most happiest girl on earth and me and my fiance is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up. So that’s why I promised to share my testimony all over the universe.All thanks goes to Olorun for the excessive work that he has done for me. Below is the email address in situation you are undergoing a heart break, and I assure you that as he has done mine for me, he will definitely help you too. email him on; Olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@gmail.com

  124. Anonymous

    Hello,everyone my name is mlmvc from USA i never ever believed in spell until i meet a man called Dr upesa, who help me cast a spell that bring back my ex-lover who left me for one years before our marriage,His spells works beyond my imaginations and today i am happily married two kids and me and my [ex-lover] now husband are very happy more than ever before,what more can i say rather than to say thank you Dr upesa for been there for me,contact him today and your life will never ever remain the same his email is upesalovetemple@gmail.com

  125. I think that if someone has a kernal of wisdom, they should post it, maybe with an article. I think the author’s factoids about likes/dislikes are a little fishy. I am pretty sure half my friends don’t even check in to Facebook. Besides, each of our posts just gets strung on a line of others. After a day or so, it’s so far in the past that no one cares. And why not vent one’s opinions through Facebook? I love getting feedback, even if its from only two of my friends. There is also one great use of Facebook – its an excellent dialogue-starter, and I have already seen it fuel revolutions. I guess its all how you look at it.

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  127. Anonymous

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  128. My name is Angelica. I want to testify the great work of Dr.Zack Balo for helping me to get my Ex boyfriend and my job back.I thank Dr.Zack Balo for helping me to recover all what i have lost before back,this is why I said I must tell the whole world, what he did for me is real, if you need his help you can contact him via wiseindividualspell@gmail.com.

  129. I want to thank DR. ekumabor for what he has done for me in my life, After my lover left me without notice i was so frustrated and confused i never knew what to do until i told my friend, After she told me the great deeds of DR.ekumabor on how people talk good about him on radio stations and internet so she gave me the contact. I email dr.ekumaborspellhome@gmail.com and told him how my lover left me for over 3years,He told me just to be happy that i will have him back to my arms that’s its only a matter of time,i was like is this real mean while i had fate in DR ekumabor that he would bring back my lover,amazingly to my surprise after 3days i got a call from my husband who has left me for over 3years begging me for forgiveness,Which i did,And now we are together and he love’s me more than anything on this earth. Please you can contact him for help on this email address; dr.ekumaborspellhome@gmail.com

  130. MELINDA

    my name is MELINDA i want to testify about a great spell caster that help me cast a spell that bring my ex boyfriend back to without any delay. I broke up with my ex with just little misunderstanding hoping we will get back shortly,but things was growing worse until i contacted DR. AKHERE who help me with his historical powers to bring him back, without charging me any money for his work, i have never believed in a spell caster until i come across DR. AKHERE Well it will be of great sin if i should go out from here without dropping the contact of this great spell caster,in case you need the help of this great spell caster you can contact him through his email: once you contact him all your problems will be over,once again i say very big thanks to you sir for helping me to recover my ex back, and please sir keep your good work cause people need your helping hand in their lives.once more contact him on his email drakherespiritualtemple@gmail.com

  131. Anonymous

    Hello every one my name Jessica from Canada i have just met with this priest Dr Okpoko of the Dr.okpokospellhome@gmail.com and i finally find out that he is really a truthful spell caster and so powerful and he is the most powerful spell caster that i have ever met. i wish i have met her before. and husband have just come back to me and every thing happened just the way he had said it i am so happy that i have met with him and now i have my husband back to my self.if you all that are here have not tried him you just have to do so and get your heart desires fulfilled. stop been doubting i have tested him and i am now a fulfilled woman.Email: ( Dr.okpokospellhome@gmail.com ) promise I told tata, about my problem and told him needed a spell to get my ex back. He assured me he could help me, so i did all the necessary things he asked me to and i made payment for the spells. He told me he would come back to me in 3days.i waited and on the 3th day, behold i saw him Crying, begging for forgiveness.

  132. Anonymous

    Also where people post talking directly to their dead relative about how much they miss them. I hope I’m not on Facebook when I’m dead. Or directly to their child who can’t even read yet, let alone have a Facebook account, to say how proud they are of them. Defriend. Done.

  133. Anonymous

    I thought this article (like all of them) was humorous, but misguided. The problems I found can kinda be summed up in the last section:
    “People who don’t love you don’t care about you or your day or your life that much, they’re probably not especially rooting for you, and they certainly want nothing to do with your worst qualities. And you doing something purely to serve your emotional or egotistical needs really should not show up on their computer screen—it just shouldn’t.”

    First, people who don’t love you don’t care about you – that is a pretty bold, unsupported statement. You make the logical connection, “Those who care about you must love you.” Even if we assumed that was true, the reader is led to think that most of your friends on facebook aren’t your actual friends – as if Facebook isn’t a site that “connects people with friends and others who work, study and live around them,” it’s an unguided media outlet where we’re just supposed to post funny pictures and videos. That is, how should I say, wrong.

    People who do not care about your day or your life should probably not be your facebook friends. I don’t think Image Crafting is accurately named annoying – you craft an image whenever you give information about yourself in general. Finally, the bubbles you give in the beginning are completely subjective. You don’t have a formula for what will be positive to everyone – you just assume that they will care about what you have to say because, well, they’re your friends. That’s all I got.

  134. My stepdaughter & her entire family hold conversations on facebook that should be personal messages sent to each other. By sharing everything so publicly, I can only imagine that they think their conversations are facinating to everyone else. People everywhere are oversharing these days, thinking they are the star of their own reality show, their facebook page.

  135. Anonymous

    Am I the only one who didn’t think this was a joke and agreed with every sentence? Because after reading the comments and seeing so many angry/defensive responses I realized maybe this was written entirely for humor, but I completely see what the author’s talking about and find the main motivations for these types of comments to be exactly what’s stated (attention craving, narcissism, etc). Yes, I’ve posted a few “pulled an all-nighter again” posts, and every once in a while most of these types of status updates are tolerable or even amusing/inspirational/touching, but they happen too frequently to be anything but annoying most of the time. People just think their lives are too damn important these days, but oh-wait, that’s what facebook is for, right? For people to publicly showcase their lives and opinions and then actually receive attention/whatever-they-want for it because they aren’t getting enough of it in real life (often because NOBODY CARES)? No, I’m not some bitter, people-hating douche-bag, and I get that a lot of people like facebook and reading all of these obnoxious comments (even if they say they hate them, but come on – people that complain about stuff like this are often on facebook all the time), but I don’t like it. Oh, that’s why I rarely go on facebook. But yeah, regardless of my dislike for these types of posts, the reason I like this article is because it realistically and straight-forwardly calls all of those irritating facebook posters out on their bullshit and reminds them that they are posting that crap for the above reasons, which is why there are so many angry replies.

    Anyway, amazing article. ;)

  136. Heh, you forgot one major one – the viral. The repost. Whether it’s reposted viral links, “cause” statuses demanding ‘likes’ and ‘shares’ or shares of somebody’s photo that everybody else has already liked and shared for some reason, virals are attention-seeking and manipulative, and just about the most annoying a person can get.

  137. Anonymous

    Instead of writing stupid, and “uninteresting” articles (the title alone said enough for me so I didn’t bother reading the entire thing), this person needs to learn how to filter and be happy for his fellow human beings.

    If you’re not happy with what someone posts on THEIR OWN page, filter it or better yet, do them a favor of not dealing with you and unfriend them. If you want to wallow in your own annoying, uninteresting world that revolves only around you… create a facebook page and don’t add anyone to it and start posting things that only interest you!
    I didn’t bother seeing who the author was either but In general, the reason for picking on other people’s status updates is probably because they’re miserable with their own life.

  138. Anonymous

    Furthermore… for those of you who think this is a joke and people who don’t like it should “chill out,” you’re just as bad. It just goes to show how self centered, intolerant and pathetic people in today’s society have come to be. Most of us add friends to Facebook to do just what Facebook is intended for, to share our lives with one another because many of us are too busy to do it any other way. I understand that some of them can be annoying, but I guarantee we can all be annoying at one time or another in our lives. Get out of your own self-centered worlds and maybe next time you see a sad status, as what is wrong and suggest that it probably isn’t a good idea to keep posting that way on facebook. Believe it or not, people do listen. And the next to you see someone happy for a success they have achieved, try being truly happy for them instead of angry because you’re miserable and haven’t worked as hard! Start caring instead of making fun of people. Life is too short!!!

  139. Anonymous

    I found this page just because I was bored…. Now I’m just feckin angry!!!! Blah to Facebookery!!!!! Thanks for putting into words everything I ever hated about Facebookers I knew they got on my wick… Just didn’t really know why….

  140. Anonymous

    Many of we readers are interested to know how the author of this article classifies it, especially since the very worst of what the post rants against is exemplified in it.

  141. Anonymous

    Rollergirl… looks to me like you have a stalker… Read this whole page and every. single. time. you post there’s dude, just ANXIOUS to tell you you’re not good enough. Just keep being you and let this fool continue to be a HUGE annoyance to all of the internet world.

    I get it, and I agree with you: “if you don’t like it don’t look… or even better, delete me”… Last I looked it says MY name at the top of my FB page, so I can write whatever in the hell I want as my status. And suck a D if you don’t like it. You’re not the social media police, and really – no one gives a flying rat’s ass what you think is or isn’t insufferable on FB!

    I, for one, like reading about how proud my friends are – yes even only Facebook friends – that they finished their masters or got into med school, or had a great time at their first pro sporting event (or their thousandth)… and HEY, I also love reading a good quote and have quite a few FB friends that have actually lifted my spirits at times simply by posting a quote. And it’s just a shame that person that wrote this has such a saaaad life that they can’t see that maybe, just maybe, people are BETTER than self-absorbed douchebags (like the author??) and posts quotes in the hopes it WILL INDEED help someone along the way.

    This whole thing reads to me of someone that has such a small opinion of their own little life, and was actually insanely jealous that they had nothing of interest happen in their lives that was worth writing about and thought they could put some value to their miserable life by pointing writing this garbage. juss’ sayin’

  142. Anonymous

    Oh my, I’ve just spotted this one. I don’t know this person (friend of a friend who’s facebook status is public – because this is too important to confine to friends and must be shared with the world…)

    “2013 is almost over! I want to take this time to be grateful. This year I have been in Indonesia, Holland, Italy, Malaysia, Thailand, Germany, Spain, and for short stop-overs in Saudi-Arabia, Switzerland and even a whole day in Kuwait I have lost a few pounds, adopted a puppy and a kitten, learned and loved to drive a scooter, sang karaoke in a very special place in Thailand, worked on a sailing boat, survived a bronchitis, got acupuncture, got addicted to Starbuck’s, ram a knive into my hand, missed my grandfather’s 85th birthday, ate more durian than I could dream of, and overall met so many new and wonderful people on the way. Thanks to everybody who gave me support or a hug, thanks to all these good people out there who take care of my cat or supported our business Balini or gave us a place to sleep.
    I wish you all a very happy christmas, buone feste, feliz navidad, fröhliche Weihnachten! And mucho Gin Tonic
    I feel blessed to the bones.”

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  144. PJ

    I think one of the WORST behaviors on FB is the e-card with “Share if you agree!” “Cats and dogs deserve to live without suffering! Share if you agree! Family is the most important thing! Share If You Agree! World hunger needs to be stopped! SHARE IF YOU AGREE!!” Because your self-righteous passive-aggressive post is smugly saying that if I don’t share this mindless glurge, I DON’T agree and am a horrible person.

  145. PJ

    Also wanted to say that this is the best-written summary of the FB problem that I’ve seen yet. I’m happy to realize that I never post that way myself. I only post my original joke e-cards, or share others’ funny posts. I was going to link to this article on FB, but I realize that a lot of my friends (real friends, I have only 46 on FB, people I actually know in real life) do sometimes post this kind of crap, and I don’t want to hurt their feelings. But kudos, very well-written and cogent article.

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  147. Matt

    I’ll take reasons why google plus is better than Facebook for 1000 please! You can target messages to your S.O., mom and pops, and everyone easily. Too bad it wasn’t created first because I can’t keep up with two social networks at once.

  148. The thing I think is most brilliant about this article and many of the comments is that we all know we do alot of the ‘insufferable stuff’, including the author… but the fascinating phenomenon is that we all find ourselves still checking Facebook. If it were truly insufferable, we all know that we don’t have to check it, and even more, we don’t have to read posts from people we don’t care about… but STILL we end up wasting chunks of our day and even find time to get annoyed, and comment on the very things that we then bitch about.

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  150. Eric

    Agreed with all replied concerning author’s own narcissism and xenophobia. What’s worse is she/he didn’t even cover the truly annoying, insidious aspect of FB: the ads and their marketing strategies.

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  152. Jae Li

    I’ll bet that most of those who hated the article realized they are guilty of the annoying social behavior the author outlines. Joking or not, its an accurate observation and if you take a hard look at yourself, you’ll realize he may be right.

  153. Squarebear

    This is absolute gold! I want to marry your mind. I acknowledge my contribution to the Facebook crimes against good taste and resolve to do better. Fantastic, still chuckiling!

    • Jae Li

      Its okay Squarebear, no need to get bent out of shape. You are obviously a very intelligent man or woman and should be changing your fb picture and cover instead of reading this garbage.

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  159. Gayle

    I got this website from my pal who informed me on the topic of this site and now this time I am browsing this site and reading very informative articles here.

  160. Anon

    Thats why I hardly post.. Most of the posts are completely lack luster, generic and stupid which serves like a recycling plant…

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  162. joniwriter

    Love it! A good laugh. And I admit it, I’m guilty of at least 3. And now I’m going to try practicing the other four to really torment my readers.

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  165. Manda

    Overall, tl;dr….much like your friends annoying status. I don’t like people who constantly brag about their relationships, but if you are such an insufferable human you don’t want people to post when they get a new job, a degree, into law school, etc…maybe you should rethink having them on your FRIENDS list. Accomplishments to be proud of absolutely deserve a spot on facebook. Didn’t people used to send out cards about graduating or something? At least now you don’t have to send virtual money.

    Maybe if you were a better writer, you’d be more successful and less of a miserable hater consumed by everyone else’s accomplishments and happiness on the Internet.

  166. RandomReader

    I do think many of these kinds of posts are annoying. But the whole issue becomes moot if you only “Friend” people who fall into the red circle in the diagram.

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  168. Rachel

    Jesus, I’m glad I don’t do Facebook. Going by this article, it seems like a constant circle of navel gazing and over-analyzing of other people’s intentions.

  169. Tom Cahill

    Your post was totally insufferable. You did all or most of the things you accuse others of. Really, it’s social media. GTF over youself, or find yourself an anti-social media to hang out on. Start your own and call it Grumpy Wanker Book

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  171. Anonymous

    Actually, every person on my Face Book list is family, or real life friends. I don’t feel bad for letting folks know how I feel, albeit in a restricted access way, or with saying thanks to same en masse after certain kinds of events or holidays. As to quotes: I like passing on info and sayings that appeal to me. Especially if they ignite debate. As to the author of this article, well, you represent the most annoying thing on Face Book or any other media for that matter. The presumption you display in dictating an etiquette for the media is worthy of a Victorian Miss. Manners. Why would any of the above annoy you? It is not yours, and cannot affect you in any way unless your psyche is so constitutionally weak and vulnerable that any gust can unseat it. In which case, this is an unwise medium to troll for things to annoy you. One can ‘ignore’, ‘block’, ‘hide’ anything you want, which is a much more respectful thing to do than dictating proper behaviour to others.

    But that would demand real social maturity, rather than the attention seeking pose this article exemplifies.

  172. fortessimo

    First, pardon my English as it is my second language.

    Thank God there is “unsubscribe” option now, so we can be spared of unnecessary information. It is actually trickier with close friends, because it is rude to unfollow them, and they expect some of their photos to be liked etc.

    I think you should write how awkward social interactions can be on FaceBook as well. For example, I sometimes like some friend’s photo/status thinking it would be too sad for him/her if nobody did, because it is damn FaceBook, and if that person couldn’t take attention on FaceBook, that would be only tragic … It is meaningless to me, but it matters to them, so why not like their status/stupid photos…

    I can’t share anything on FaceBook. Not even interesting stuff… I thought of sharing an article in this website. Here is the thought process that changed my mind;

    “OK, this article is so cool, people should read it! But it had been such a long time since I shared anything. After sharing this, the next thing I share should be as good as this. Will I ever find something as good as this? And what if I found something better, sharing all the cool stuff regularly will make them ordinary, because, obviously people usually don’t check everything on FaceBook. Then, some of these good stuff would be wasted. And what if someone liked what I shared and shared it with his/her circle? I hate that. That’s something I found in the internet you c…! We both know you are not the type of person who would come across such a cool thing in the internet. Look at all the shit you share on your page! Don’t use my brain to look cool to your friends. And what if more people like his/her share then mine? That would be so unfair!!! I can’t let that happen!”

  173. S

    The author just might have missed the point of social media. I’m not sure what kind of posts they think should be out there, but maybe it would be easier for them to just delete their Facebook account.

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  176. Chris A J

    This quote from Downton Abbey (s4e5) reminded me of this blog entry: “Some people run on greed, lust, even love,” the Dowager says of Isobel. “She runs on indignation.” Which isn’t to say that this blog runs on indignation, but this particular entry is leaning that way. It’s still funny though.

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  179. Nicole

    This author just sounds like a hater to me. I mean it’s one thing for people to attempt to bait others into sympathy or into asking questions because they want attention on FB, that I don’t care for because it’s pure negativity.

    However, the example status used at the beginning does not fall into that category. Why can’t you like it and be happy for your friend who clearly has had a great year? I know I would and Id also be proud of said friend.

    Seems like the author has simply revealed their own insecurities by making fun of someone who is content and happy with their life and level of success. If the author was content and happy as well then they’d have no reason to criticize.

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  182. anonymous

    what the author is talking about is only true if the facebook friends are not really friends because true friends accept whatever their friends post

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  184. laura richardson

    Hi,

    I did not read any of the above posts because I wanted to respond
    without the filter of all the “haters and lovers.”

    I just want you to know that you are spot on with your descriptions of FB
    posters. I just “deactivated” my FB account a few days ago b/c I am so tired
    of the narcissistic, attention craving idiots that are trolling for attention
    and self acceptance. What a load of crap. I have to say that I miss seeing the
    trivial posts of my cousins and 2nd cousins and relatives I didn’t know that
    I had, but in the long run, I am protected from the evil (not really evil, but you
    know what I mean), sad, pretentious, self-seeking, look-at-me, providers of
    bullshit and anemic self serving crap that it’s worth it. I can go to sleep knowing
    that I didn’t check my “status” or who “liked” me – what a load of horse shit.

    Thanks,

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  199. Got it all right

    If you don’t agree with this article then you are either

    a) too young

    or

    b) old enough, but lacking the maturity/wordly and cultural experiences in life

    The world is a better place without 99% of what Facebook is, which is what the above article details. Facebook is good for creating events. And whether you want to ignore it or not, the truth is that 99% of posts fall into the categories detailed in this article. I’ve read a couple comments about someone posting about getting their PhD and how that’s perfectly fine and that he was doing it to tell close friends and family I think? Well tell me this, how would close friends and family not already know this?? You’re Mom or Dad or best pal is going to find out on Facebook that you just finished with your PhD??? Give me a break, nice attempt at an excuse, but complete miss. Again I’ll say, this is truly accurate artircle and the world would be better off without Facebook (with a few exceptions as I mentioned, like setting up events or posting pictures for your smartphone picture sending/receiving technologically challenged parents,).

    • Yo

      I totally agree with you. I was surprised to see so many people writting bitter replies to this so very well detailed decription of most fb posts.

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  201. bigas

    I really liked this article ! I even identify myself with some of this people !! I only posts things that make me look “good” (as beautiful, or interesting, or with a cool life, great vacations etc).
    And I think that most people does it ! It is funny to laugh about yourself and others sometimes. ;-)

    And personnaly I really prefer this kind os self centered status than the depressing ones eg “I feel so lonely” or “life is hard” or “I hate my job” ahahah

    Thanks for the post ! ;-)

  202. Jeannine

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  206. Xodz

    There’s no such thing as “jealousy inducing”

    you should not attempt to change the way other think, but to share happiness with a friend – the way they view it you will NEVER control.

  207. Sara

    Absolutely great! Congrats and thanks for voicing my personal opinion so well! Love you (in a manner of speaking, of course), whoever you are!

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